chasing starlights

belated resolutions.

2011-01-08T23:45:00.002+08:00

Dear self/blog/readers who haven't given up on this blog (ahem!),

God knows how long it has been since I actually get to come home from wherever, with the time and peace for myself. I miss Rachel-time lots. Growing up is starting to scare me a bit. I wonder how the adults cope. At the moment I devote 12 hours a day working, often time more. 3 hours travelling. Slot in a couple more for church/him. What's left is just sleep. Thankfully, I get minimum six hours of sleep these days. And tomorrow I get to sleep in. Praise God church starts at 11.30am, hehe. (:

But gee, I cannot imagine having a real job in the near future, actively serving in church at the same time juggling with family responsibilities. Yikes. I wonder if that 14-year-old girl who just got married ever considered such realities. I get creeped out just thinking about it, despite I often caught myself daydreaming about my perfect adulthood. Bleh.

I digressed.

I've been so caught up with work, I hardly feel any sense of festivity. No hype, I'm almost jaded. Christmas and New Year's felt so foreign for the first time. Work kinda sucked the life out of me. I forgot all about new year's resolutions, and thought I won't have the time to think of my 2011 resolutions/reminders.

Now I'm just too darn sleepy to write anymore, bother.

Rachel the rookie reporter/rusted blogger signs out for the night,

who cares about normality?

2011-01-02T23:25:00.003+08:00

Who cares, if you're happy?

Like a lot of you out there, I am young and ambitious. My career comes first after God.

But I'd give it up for a happy, wholesome family. God knows the things I'd sacrifice for that.

Food for thought for a brand new year, I guess.

rachel the reporter.

2010-12-16T22:59:00.003+08:00

"Challenging" is an understatement.

It's cut-throat.

I'm a big, big girl.

2010-11-28T21:15:00.003+08:00

Wow, it has been almost half a year since I've updated this blog! It almost feels like a stranger to me now.

Tomorrow I'll be opening a new chapter in life - oh how cliché and half true. I'll be undergoing my third internship, this time at The Star, before I officially graduate with a journalism degree in my hands. ;) And then, I step into the vicious industry. So I heard it's vicious.

While I was often caught ranting and counting down the days to graduation, anticipating to relive the fun I had working in magazines, recently I've been dreading to move on. Time to grow up, but I'm still sitting in my little happy bubble; too complacent (and perhaps, too lazy) to get out.

My heart and mind battled it out before settling for this major newspaper corporation. My mind won, for your information. ;) It's the night before another challenge arises, I cannot do anything but pray for an open mind, more for an open heart. Knowing that He has something big in store for me. Knowing that I have a bunch of great people who has got my back. (:

Nonetheless.

I'm happy where I'm at, at the moment. Hallelujah! ;)

Joash Wee Ren Qian.

2010-06-22T23:46:00.008+08:00

It was funny how we met. But if you didn't approach me at the YES reunion dinner 2 years back, I wouldn't know that you're actually my senior in university. The worship director in TCPJ's Christian Fellowship. And how great of a friend whom I'm now missing so badly.

Like everyone else, I couldn't believe my ears, or rather my eyes when Jolyn uttered the words (over MSN), "Joash died." It did not make sense at all. It won't make a difference even if I was wide awake. I still wouldn't have believed it. It took me an eternity to grasp reality.

Suddenly it all came crashing down on me again. The second death within half a year. I never expected myself to mope, cry and mourn over your death for three days in a row. You were not a close friend, but a good friend. Good enough that your leaving carved a big hole in my heart.

I still remember the last time we talked. It was after a PR class, and we were discussing about the final semester's schedule, the crazy Russian bunny show called Usavich, and my high recommendation of The Annoying Orange. And then we talked about the magazine I interned at.

You: What magazine was that?

Me: Tell. T-e-l-l.

You: Oh. So, tell me about it. *your trademark cheeky grin included

How lame you were Joash Wee! We were laughing hysterically during that conversation. And I still remember I was waiting for Jolyn while looking at the club recruitment tables and you mimicked a potential bimbo who participates in the first meeting of the Fashion Club. I don't remember what exactly you said, but I know it cracked me up. Never knew you were that funny, you crazy man.

Even though, regretfully, we never spent much time together, there are a couple of things about you I'm sure about. Your warm, friendly, dashing ever-present smile. Your talents. Your heart for people, and our Lord Jesus Christ. It doesn't take much for anyone to fall for you, Joash. You're one of those people who touches people's lives even in brief moments. That's quite magical, ain't it? You have lived a life Jesus have lived while He was on Earth; humble, selfless, charismatic. It's impossible to not love you. (:

As much as I miss you, and it hurts knowing how you have left, at the same time I know it's all within Daddy's plan. Bet you must be rocking your heart out in heaven. Daddy would be so very proud of you. Have a great time with your earthly daddy and sisters too. Don't forget to look out for your mommy, your brother and sisters on earth here too. And don't forget us too!

Love you, bro. (:

hiatus.

2010-05-30T02:22:00.010+08:00

Hi readers, I'm back from a 2-month hiatus... to announce the extension of my hiatus for the next 5 months.

taking a little break.

(stinkin' pink by simple tess @ Flickr)

I've got a lot going on and gotta focus on some other stuffs right now. But perhaps I'll be publishing a post or two sometime in between, so don't delete my blog link off yours just yet? (:

Take care loves. God bless!

Raquel

busy bee.

2010-03-30T21:55:00.003+08:00

I'm supposed to be preparing the youth service weekly schedule. And start working on my 1500-word CAIR essay. But I'm feeling so, so...

...careless. (:

Paramour-ed. ♥

2010-03-13T16:10:00.002+08:00

So the princess is back from Singapore. This Monday. (:

Don't got much time to write about the trip so let the photos speak for itself. I had such an incredible time, and especially at Paramore's kick-ass concert! Went on a major shopping spree there- Cotton On, by the way, is SO affordable there and Bugis Street is just amazing! Couldn't resist but to shop some more now that I'm back, hehe.

But you know what's a real feel-good factor? The fact that I supported myself financially 100% for this trip. Heck I never realized til my mom pointed that out to her friend! I guess I have the right to be proud of myself for that? (:

What's better is that she acknowledged that and I really would give her the credits because she raised me up to be just like her- an independent woman. (: Not trying to blow my own trumpet but really, I got it from my momma! (;

And ultimately, all glory goes to God because a big (sometimes, careless) spender like me survived 3 days in a country whose currency is three times the RM's value. God truly provided, and I even came back with excess! (:

This trip is certainly a highlight of my 2010. Looking forward to more backpacking adventures, aren't we, Ivy? (;

wish you were there!

happy. (:

2010-03-01T18:07:00.007+08:00

happiness. by ~asfeexiated on Deviantart.

Never have I been this happy. I smile often. I laugh more. I get giggle fits every 3.571 seconds.

Every moment is God-given, and being so happy makes me appreciate what He has blessed me with. And 2010 has been all about blessings. Blessings upon blessings. May these blessings overflow upon those around me!

For sure, my 2010 will not be happy all year round. But I'm experiencing a fabulous beginning and I hope my outlook stays that way come rain or shine.

My pastor was right. When you obey God and walk in His ways, He'll bless you with much more than you ask for. Joy beyond expectations.

I cannot ask for more.

When you're happy, you don't need the most grandiloquent of words to tell stories. And what's a happy post without a happy ending?

(:

lovedrunk.

2010-03-01T01:42:00.004+08:00

Love is patient.

But I don't want to wait to show you every bubble of love I have.

Bubbles and bokeh by Laauraa on Deviantart.

... for you.

(:

start of something new.

2010-02-19T16:04:00.008+08:00

Hello readers!

It’s been a while since I last posted a decent entry, and I can finally do so now that I’m in a happy, reflective and Internet-less mode. Haha.

How has 2010 been treating you hitherto? It’s close to the end of February and thankfully to Daddy, I’m enjoying every moment of this spanking new year! 2010 so far has been a period of fresh starts and pleasant surprises.

Grandma’s departure was a celebration more than anything. It was quite shocking and devastating as I could never imagine the arrival of this day. Like the late MJ, grandma is one of those people who had always been around and you thought she’ll continue to be here. Nevertheless I’m happy she left because she doesn’t have to deal with diseases and everything that comes along with old age. I’m happy she left so peacefully, and on such a significant occasion- Christmas Day. When Christ was born on Earth, she is now born again in heaven. Am pretty sure she’s having the time of her life up there now- pun totally intended, hehe.

Mom has also been a lot less tensed ever since Grandma left, and I understand entirely why. Turning grand 21 soon and as much as I hate to jinx one of my resolutions, I think it’s a great year and good start to spend more time with her. Now let’s just hope my actions speak louder than that.

Chinese New Year, unlike previous years, has been so enjoyable! For some funny reason, I have been so in touch with my cina self. That includes my obsession towards cheongsams, specifically grandma’s vintage ones. And I’ve also been visiting people a lot, instead of just rotting at home waiting for people to come- quite sad I know, but this is what happens when you don’t have many relatives! Ultimately I’ve been enjoying Auntie Alice (a fellow church member)’s delectable cooking for the past week! If only I had sumptuous dinner like that every night, I would be one fat little girl!

oriental princesses.

Also, my internship had been a blessing. It was worlds different from my experience at seventeen- the demographics, the modus operandi, my colleagues, the establishment etc. Either way, I learnt a couple of things if not a lot. And definitely met the most wonderful (and whacky) of people, from my colleagues and superior to the individuals I interviewed. To have tête-à-tête sessions with local renowned fashion writers was certainly one of the highlights, I couldn’t ask for more. (:

I have finally let go of something (or someone) dear to me for about two good long years. My stubbornness certainly did give me the strength to hold on to something for close to a year but circumstances were just breaking that force. My mind understood how nothing could work out when God says no, and it took me a rough while for my heart to succumb to that fact. Anyhow, we had our share of good times and he was a really great loyal companion. (:

On a brighter note in the same chapter, a (familiar) door opened as my window shut. Four years and a lot of BS later, chemistry reignited itself and in a nutshell (roll those eyes, yeah), this chapter has never been sweeter and so refreshing. There’s something about chemistry which you can’t control but for the love of Christian Louboutin heels, we hope not to get ahead of ourselves and screw up this time. One thing’s for sure, we’re constantly praying. You see, we can write out our plans all we want, but at the end of the day, it’s best to let God have the eraser or liquid paper. Heck, He owns it either way! :P

Here goes the best for last. What’s fantabulous about my three-month break is good ol’ quality time spent with my dear BFFness! It almost seems like a miracle to have met up with her for a good few occasions (no thanks to family obligations and her crazy hours interning at the production house!), although she has had no whatsoever fate with any of the exclusive seventeen events I attended and intended to bring her. Anyhow, no complaints because each BFF date was fun-filled girliness with loads of heart-to-heart talks to boot! The past year was quite a pain in the ass for us, but we’re definitely living it up as BFFs more than ever. So Wei Jiin if you’re reading, NO CRACK leh! Or at least, ‘mended’ crack, haha. I’m gonna miss you when you return Down Under babes!

my pretty BFF. (:

Whoa, talk about verbal diahorrhea! No apologies though, only my pure gratitude to Daddy for the generous blessings He has poured on me thus far! Hope y’all are doing fabulous too. In everything, give thanks. (:

Love, xoxo.

celebrating me, but.

2010-01-17T23:48:00.001+08:00

I freaking miss you.

time out.

2010-01-15T22:38:00.003+08:00

Yeah so the updates on this blog have slowed down heaps. That's what you get when you're working and the only time for leisure activities is on weekends. Thus the schedule's packed and busy with church and the youth, work and outings; there's just no time to breathe!

Lots have been going on lately, plus a whole lotta rollercoaster rides. The world's a stage, they say. And my life's a drama. Worthy enough to be an episode of Gossip Girl too if I may add. Haha. If anything, I constantly tweet so you can catch a glimpse of the going-ons in my life. (:

I end this blogpost with my absolute favourite scene in Gossip Girl season 2 (like finally I'm moving on!).

...

Um, kay. Embedding is disabled so just watch the sweetest moment of Blair and Chuck and smile away. My heart melted. (:

Parisian macaroons, pretty pink gardenias and "I love you, too".
Finally, Chuck. Finally. (:

trouble in paradise.

2010-01-11T17:34:00.003+08:00

Chuck: [to Nate] Tell her how you feel. Give her a chance to be with a guy who does deserve her.

Maybe it's time you tell her that yourself, Chuck.

all i want for christmas.

2009-12-23T22:49:00.007+08:00

Been meaning to write out my Christmas list but was too occupied at work and in the weekends. I cannot believe it's Christmas Eve tomorrow, I guess sitting in the office facing the computer screen has transferred me into a bubble of oblivion. And since nobody in the office celebrates Christmas, there won't be a round of Secret Santa this year- awww.

mini reunion! (:

gorgeous peekture of the BFF & I. (:

Sadly I don't feel the Christmas spirit this year but I do have quite a list of presents I want- mind you, I'm saying this in full consciousness that it is unlikely I will receive one or if any of the things I want. So don't mind me, the list is for my own reference or for another sweet generous soul who would like to cheer me up with a present this festive season. (:

For one, I am desperately in need of ~~the ever-awesome~~ a Global Positioning System (GPS) kit. Friends and readers who know me well should know that my sense of direction is close to none. And it doesn't help when interviews, parties, dates, shopping and events happen at venues far from familiar in my geographically-retarded mind. Le sigh!

FML.
(photo by skylawns @ Flickr.)

Somebody please fix my iPod's earphones! God-knows-what happened to the right ear's output but yes, PLEASE FIX IT! ): It's ironic because last year, I sent Esther (of 17)'s headphones to be fixed as I was her Secret Santa. She was overjoyed to have her headphones all fine and dandy again! So anyone willing to be mine this year? (:

Surprisingly, I have nothing more to ask for. Although, my fashion wish list is constantly expanding so, ahem. (;

And argh, my biggest Christmas wish now is for the developing pimple on my face to disappear! Rawrr!

Anyway, Christmas is all about giving- as demonstrated by our Almighty God.

For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son that whoever who believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.

- John 3:16

(photo by tres.jolie @ Flickr)

Jesus is the gift God gave each and everyone of us. Thus Jesus is the reason for the season- also the reason behind the existence of candy canes. (:

Blessed Christmas, all. (:

short & crisp.

2009-12-17T22:31:00.006+08:00

I'm not surprised if one day Tweeting takes over blogging. Updates are short, crisp and usually timely. And when we really need to rant, our followers' Twitter pages will soon be spammed with multiple Tweets of your couch-scratching cat/sneaker-chewing dog/head-biting boss et cetera. Of which I believe that it really helps us get those negativity out of the system so all is good with Twitter. Just make sure your boss don't see your favourite four letter f-word line after line after line...

See, when I'm partially dysfunctional in the mind due to lack of sleep, I ramble like this. So let's make this a short and crisp update, shall we?

The internship
I'm currently interning with yet another publication, Tell magazine (under Tell Media). People here are friendly much, and having met the publisher/founder for only an hour, I must say I'm truly amazed and she has my respect almost immediately. So far, I've been assigned to do loads of fashion research. Today, I am officially in charge of writing a fashion feature. The expectations are definitely higher in this magazine, not to mention a heavier workload too. So yes, I do feel the pressure but I'm letting that be a motivation to kick-ass and impress. (;

Tell has been around for 3 years already, yet I find many who haven't heard of it. Frankly speaking, I haven't either until Winnie told me about it after an article she wrote about the late Yasmin Ahmad was published in it. What gives Tell its cutting edge is that it has its sophisticated lifestyle section but it also encompasses critiques on politics, religion, finance and so on. To clear your curiosity and cut it short, Tell is all lifestyle of the rich and famous. (;

An Honest Mistake
This is no update but just to encourage you guys to head over to Voize, take a listen at their very catchy single This Song Is So Random I Don't Know Why (yes, you read the title right!), and mass/spam vote them! Chances to vote are limitless, so vote away and perhaps they'll emerge the winner at VIMA. An Honest Mistake is nominated for the Best College Act as well as Sunshiney Smiley Feel Good Song. (:

To show some "tangible" and more practical support, you can head on down to The Library this Sunday evening to vote for them. Bands who got through will be playing at the quarter finals and the party starts at 8pm so move your bums there and enjoy some awesome headbanging local music! :D

The world may or may not end in 2012 but...
2010 is absofreakinglutely the year of rock! Yours truly found out that Saosin will be hitting the shores of KL (are there any?) and rocking it out on February 1st. Meanwhile.

My Christmas present has arrived early in the form of confirmed, official news from Paramore's website itself regarding their South East Asia tour. Fortunately, I wasn't placing my bets they're coming to KL and as outrageous as it sounds, I had every intention to fly to Adelaide just to attend their concert late February but God's plan for me to stay is brilliant!

PARAMORE LIVE IN SINGAPORE
on MARCH 7, 2009

I KID YOU NOT.

I don't give a flying shit (please don't imagine that literally) because there is no freaking way I am not getting my cute ass to Kiasu-land this March where all the fabulous concerts and parties are! So what if I miss one day of class, I'd kill to see Paramore it's not funny. In fact, I'll even go alone if I had to.

Although.

Anyone coming with me for some hardcore partying and shopping in the weekends before the concert? (:

Christmas is here, and Santa Claus is still NOT coming to town!
My favourite season of the year finally! Holidays, parties, people, warmth, presents, goodwill and joy and Jesus- the reason of the season! People have got to stop using "X-mas". Who the hell invented that term anyway? You can't replace Christ with an X! What are you? A Satanist?!

Exhales.

So instead of having Christmas Eve Caroling, my church is organising an evangelistic event In Search of the Perfect Gifts, featuring the very hot speaker from India. He can knock off Hrithik Roshan anyday in the Bollywood scene I tell ya.

But we all know he's not the point okay. :P Feel free to give me a buzz if you're interested alright? (:

P/S: Tell me what you guys think of the flyer design? :D

--

I gotta run now, so much for making this 'short and crisp' HAHAHA. Nights citizens of the WWW. (:

balloons over my head. (:

2009-12-08T00:43:00.011+08:00

HAI.

I almost forgot what my blog was for, sheesh. So I'm hoping to make a quick little update here. I have been pretty much doing nothing but bumming at home. Namely, hooked on playing Bejeweled like a mad woman, sleeping and waking up at the most ungodly hours. Surprisingly (or not) I haven't been eating much- one or one point five meals a day and just in case you think I'm nothing but a big juicy piece of sloth, I have been mass applying for internship and job opportunities. (:

Which so far has dampened my anticipation to start getting down to business this week. Le sigh!

However, I did manage to meet up with the BFF ♥

Although only for a super short moment, we got to catch up over our absolute favourite tom yum goong at Secret Recipe and much window shopping- Cotton On, baybeh! :D

this is Rae. she is my BFF.

this is me. who is also Rae's BFF. lawlswtfreak.

On another note, yesterday night was a HUGE bummer for me because I missed the Battle of the Bands competition at The Library. I was dying to go rock out to our very talented local bands - Rosevelt (an eye candy for a lead vocalist is a total bonus absolutely *wink) and of course, An Honest Mistake. (:

And today didn't start very pretty for me either, although I just have to keep reminding myself that some things are just not what God has planned. Better news is, His plans are always perfect so I just have to put my faith in that and keep trying and hoping. (:

that's me, helping out at my church's Children's Christmas Tea Party. (x

and this is Jia Wen, the cutest thing ever! she certainly made my day. (:

sink into vanilla skies with my mom's homemade cupcakes! (((:

Oh yes, I am going head over heels in love with Paramore's Brand New Eyes! Like any other album I totally dig, I have been listening to it for God-knows how many days consecutively. Brick by Boring Brick is one track that caught my attention, so did the super cool video!

Ignorance aside, personal favourites include Playing God, Where the Lines Overlap and All I Wanted. But scrap that, the entire album is rock-worthy.

I'm in love.

watchmybaby. (:

2009-11-21T15:13:00.006+08:00

Ah yes, I finished my final assignment yesterday. Which marks the final day of my fourth semester! FOURTH! How time flies, and I wish it would fly faster til' the day I graduate and venture into the much more fun, challenging yet real working world. Max, if you're reading this, assure me it's better than university life will you? (x

Oops, pardon my lack of manners. I now apologise for the very long hiatus (about a month!) which I'm sure all of you know why already. Thank God I'm still very much sane, although signs of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) are still visible as I have been violently abused by this forsaken little software called ~~Nightmare~~Dreamweaver.

Anyhow. In fulfilling ~~popular~~ Ju Enn's demand to reignite my dying blog, I shall now leave you with my Introduction to Film and TV Production assignment. It's not perfect but I'm proud of it. (:

For the 394285th time, I'd like to thank Florence and Geoffrey for being such a gorgeous ~~dysfunctional~~ cast. And Jolyn, for ~~letting me boss you around~~ helping me out with the production. You've been fantabulous ~~munching on Marmite bread and Honey Stars~~. (((:

I've had enough of writing for now, it hurts if I write further.

Ouch.

See?

But before I go, warm hugs to Rae who has just returned home. (: Welcome home, BFF. ♥

word play.

2009-10-18T01:16:00.004+08:00

//

Please.
Rip my heart.
Let me bleed.
Flow til it's dry.
Stab my flesh.
Make me cry.
Down to my last.

Exhaustion.
Hope is losing- lost.
Numb my pain.
Welcome ignorance.
Inject some bliss.
For a second.
And another.

Fall in love.
Fall freely.
Fall apart.
Fall out.

Intoxicate me.
I am unrecognizable.

//

for the fun of it.

2009-10-12T22:31:00.004+08:00

To put it simply:

I fell in love with a dress in Kitschen. Tried it on. Snapped a photo in the dressing room. Did not intend to participate in whatsoever contest. Checked out Kitschen's blog recently. Decided to give it a try.

For the fun of it. (:

yes, you don't have to describe the obvious! :P

My entry was uploaded today, promptly a day after submission. And now I only have five (?!) measly little votes. ): And I have about 2000 votes to win in order to well... win. What's the prize? I don't even remember myself! (x

But please please please, double the chocolate/vanilla sauce and triple the toppings- VOTE FOR ME! :D No worries about registration and whatnot kinda fuss. It's as simple as a click! (:

I ♥ you all! (((:

who's your girl?

2009-09-25T00:14:00.004+08:00

Hello, all.

Yours truly just got home from the Obsuradio at Laundry Bar, just for the one and only An Honest Mistake! They opened tonight's event with four to five songs, which needless to say, was ear-deafening, bass-pumping, guitar-slinging, and all about headbanging- everything that I love! Bite me!

Gosh I'd just ~~die~~live to become the lead vocalist of a rock band à la Hayley Williams or Dawn Richardson. Le sigh! And oh, we ~~snuck~~ brought in Syaf's little 11-year-old brother along- total cutie in a I-wanna-squish-him kinda way. :D Not only he is no longer a gig-virgin (yes it was his first gig and it was deafening to him poor thing!), he is also no longer a bar-virgin. Duh-oh, what have we done?! Kidding, people. All of us drank Pepsi and 7-Up, which were also the most expensive soft drinks we had in our lives hahaha.

Photos will be uploaded soon ~~if I care enough~~ and guess what I found out?

remember my name: pynkfreakadelic. ;P

Worship me, baybeh! Haha I'm so easily flattered but then again, I'm very easy to impress. Ahem, ahem.

P/S: Don't worship me, like seriously cuz it is written, thou shalt only worship the one and only true God. :D

PP/S: I just realized my English sucked in those comments, my apologies! This is what happens when you view serious videos and try to comment critically in the middle of the night. Eheh.

PPP/S: Nothing to read anymore, so run along now and go to bed! Hehe.

Laundry

2009-09-22T17:23:00.001+08:00

Dobi or bar? Take your pick. :D

I gotta feeling

2009-09-22T16:08:00.004+08:00

Bummerama, that's what!

Boredom depresses me. Yawns. See?

Not that I have nothing to do. I have a stack of DVDs to watch comprising of Yasmin Ahmad's productions and Jean-Pierre Jeunet's Amélie. I could get started on those pricks of an assignment, if only I can remember what I'm supposed to do. There are also a couple of books I borrowed since 34618 years ago which I haven't read. Or alternatively, I could continue spring cleaning my room- you should see my room now, it's so fricking tidy!

when hell broke loose.

finally, the chair can fulfill its purpose. (x

the place I do everything
(don't need to eye on who I'm webcamming with, I only do it with one person and one person alone and you shall never know who lolwth).

so much better, right? :P

In fact, I have quite a list to do but I'm just too laze-ay! Yawns again. Can I please fast forward to the weekends when the fun begins ~~and unfortch, when the hols are ending too~~!

Ah, crap of the century. I haven't gotten hold of the BEP tickets too. The sloth bug has bitten me unconscious! ):

AMUSE MOI!

P/S: I iz not a fan of computer-mediated communication (CMC). I'd probably fail in a LDR if I were in one.

eclipse?

2009-09-13T22:50:00.004+08:00

Tonight, I decided to watch all the 15Malaysia videos there are on YouTube. I must say, I'm really impressed by them. But James Lee's production is the deepest and thought-provoking one, although I had to watch it twice to be able to interpret and critically digest what message he is sending.

My interpretation of the story is basically an analogy.

Azman Hassan represents the irresponsible politicians or members of the government, while Daphne Iking plays the ignorant and brainwashed rakyat.

It's not like Malaysians don't catch up with the news. We do, like what Daphne Iking is doing in the video. She watches and she listens. Problem is, she merely watch and listen. Okay, so she tries asking Azman Hassan for confirmation, and seeking assurance. Unsurprisingly, the guy tells her ideally everything she wants to hear. That everything's okay. Either that, or he just purges out bullshit and taps into her already brainwashed little mind. Empty promises and false hope?

In the end, when she least expects it, he betrays her. Just when the news are warning women about photographs being taken by boyfriends and beaus. Practising what you preach?

To some viewers out there who think that Daphne Iking "can't act for nuts", I beg to differ. I think that her stiffness was intended to portray ignorance and the state of long-term brainwashing. Passivity.

Nevertheless I think the key lesson here is the classic ol' peribahasa, "harapkan pagar, pagar makan padi." Simply meaning, someone you were relying on breaks your trust.

Gerhana means eclipse.

breakfast with audrey.

2009-09-13T00:34:00.004+08:00

I have been PMS-ing.

Therefore have not been updating the blog or all of you will only groan at my rants and ramblings over the slightest detail you don't care about.

Last night I was crying for no reason, and was as moody as menopause. But I converted all my negative energy into creative art.

the result.

She's très stylish, is she not? And I believe she doubles the class Tiffany & Co. has. Wonder if I'll ever have my own tiny little baby blue box with a shiny surprise in it. (:

rais yatim, roll out!

2009-08-27T21:28:00.008+08:00

I promise I'll do my JE after this post kay. But watch this:

Gosh do I wanna slap him or what. Bloody no respect for other people and you call yourself the Minister of Information, Communication and Culture? My cute ass is more cultured than that.

I was going through the comments dropped off regarding the video until I reached the oldest page and this is epic.

click to enlarge please!

Well, at least he isn't banning the upcoming Black Eyed Peas concert. So far so good, that is.

What can I say? The Malaysian government needs all the prayers it can get. And I'm not even being cynical, le sigh.

There goes my 300th post.

rays of colour.

2009-08-26T22:49:00.003+08:00

The serial procrastinator is back.

Jeng jeng jeng.

Instead of working on my JE articles, I am still actively going out and as obvious as it gets, I changed my blogskin. :D I selected a layout, applied the colour scheme of another skin, personalize the content and then made use of my HTML/CSS knowldge thanks to IDM (Mr. Anan must be extremely proud of me he'll tear hahaha!) to edit my layout and voila! The uber awesome blog skin of mine you are looking at now! :D

Three to four hours of hard work kay, so bring on the comments! :P

Why Matthew 6:33? I have to credit this two things in my trip to Cambodia. In the team, there was a dating couple. In them, I saw their hearts and minds focused on God. Needless to say, they are so blissful and blessed. It then dawned upon me that when you honour God, He will honour you and your relationship too. But of course His abundance of love doesn't stop there. (:

The following incident I'd like to thank Kevin.

Ps. Sothy: So Kev, do you have a girlfriend?
Kevin: Nah, I don't think I want one for now. It'll distract me from my walk with God.

Instantly the verse Matthew 6:33 struck me. How most of us chase after things in life with our own strength; some succeed while some don't. How we are so passionate running after these things that we forsook our passion for God and not even realise it until we lost it all.

But that's how humans are, we are impatient, slow to listen and too quick to speak and act. We only notice the tangible and just 'don't have the time' to wait upon the Lord. What's more, we often see the luxuries in other people's life yet we seldom count our own blessings. We're just too focused on our flaws. We envy. But hey, maybe that's just me. (:

Matthew 6:33 really hit me- in a good way. It gave me hope, comfort and redirected my focus in life. Now that it is loudly reminding me everytime I visit my own blog, I pray that it'll be a principle I'll be strongly holding on to throughout my youth. Heck, for the rest of my life. Even if I change my blog skin in months to come. (:

I'm just a budding rose, waiting to bloom. (:
Source: blingqueenforever @ flickr

What I'm trying to say is; seek His will, spend time with Him, trust Him, obey Him, honour Him. At times what God asks us to do seem utterly ridiculous, but blessing ensues after obedience- a lesson my pastor taught me. And because God knows us inside and out, He'll shower us with blessings beyond what we desire and they are a gazillion times more rewarding!

Oh yes, 100% satisfaction guaranteed. (;

rockstars and jetplanes.

2009-08-24T14:44:00.011+08:00

So, the Communication students get a week off.

Thus, here I am munching on Chipsmore cookies, stalking other people's girlfriends and updating my blog. Been out and about frequently lately, and am overwhelmed by the happenings to jot them all down. But briefly, I shall!

Sunday: Dinner at Amelia's supposed surprise farewell party by the pool. Was bloody tired and PMS-ing thus left early. Had a good time anyway, sorry Ame! ):

Monday: Dinner date with Samuel and Kevin. Kev a.k.a. Annoying brat was about to return to London, but annoying brat was sweet and generous to buy us dinner. (: I'm not liking the fact he thinks all bloggers are the same, and that blogs are a bore. ):

so-called "sedikit", haha!

Brat and I. (:

Tuesday: Watched Gadoh in Christian Fellowship. Pretty good film, plus Raj Kumar is utterly adorable! Found out about this big-scale Amazing Race event organised by Peter's TCHT class, am psyched but still contemplating. Potential partner? Mr. Sepet himself. (Not that he needs the RM2k, anyway. :P).

let's take it outside!

Wednesday: Date with rockstar Joel finally. Fella's got a good ol' makeover, and looking great. (; He didn't know Ghosts of Girlfriends Past was a chick flick but he bought the tickets so we watched it anyway HAHAHAHA! Popeye's was such a disappointment, although the mashed potato was nyumm-y. Dropped him off at SS15 for his jamming session but was too tempted to meet and greet An Honest Mistake. Bought their cute stickers in support of them and went home partially-deaf and happy. :D

dum de dum.

the female vocalist thought we're dating, lol!

While I'm here, allow me to do some promo for the band. Their music is pretty wicked, and this is coming from someone who watched and heard their live jamming session alright so you guys better check them out. They can be found on YouTube, and are actively having gigs all throughout the nation. Recently they have been getting loads of publicity and if you happen to like their stickers or shirts, you can always drop me a message. Cheh wah, like I'm their band manager or something. Haha. Nah, just one of their fans and a good supportive friend. (;

rising to fame.

my stickers! uber cute or what? :D

Thursday: Brought Joel, Mark, Curly (from Ps. Kala's church in Cambodia who is in KL and staying with Joel) to have dinner at a famous Ho Chak!-endorsed local lat tong (or directly translated as spicy soup) restaurant in Serdang, together with Chee Weng and Sam.

Friday: Watched the anticipated Up with Ed at Mid Valley, loved it tonnes! Absolute cuteness, with humour and a million of rainbow-coloured balloons in the baby blue-painted skies. Happy happy joy joy. (:

Gosh, now I want a floating house too.

Sunday: Participated in a food-distribution event at Masjid Jamek to the homeless, the drug addicts and the poor. Pretty big community project by Grace Community Center and was officiated by Datuk Chew Mei Fun. Approached a ntv7 broadcast journalist, would prefer to think that she wasn't a snob. Saw myself on the news, very much amused. Overall, the event was eye-opening and am glad I could work, sweat and touch lives for God with God's people- the CF members! (:

I was there, were you? (:
Source: The Star Online

Today: Farewell dinner for Suet Lai who's returning to Russia. Having Italian tonight, I heard. Bloody lazy initially but since classes are cancelled, I'm moving my big fat ass off this chair! Cheerios.

S & B.

2009-08-16T00:44:00.008+08:00

Haiya, I'm supposed to be in bed 52 minutes ago but here I am determined to blog before I lose my enthusiasm and start to forget stuffs. Blehh, stupid 8am classes.

Anyway, d'ya think it's weird if my best friends start calling me R, à la Gossip Girl? What's weirder is that they share the same name. And I'd have to call my best friend of 13 years, M.

...

Hmm, I guess not.

So I met up with M, finally, after a few postponements. Mun Yee and I started off as best friends ever since we were 7. Yet, we were also each other's fiercest competitor. Up until SPM was over, and we got the same result anyway so all is cool, hahaha. Before the date, I was telling the J-Girls about how competitive Mun Yee and I were all those years, and when we returned to college today...

Jolyn: Hey how was the outing with your best friend?
Me: Oh, it was awesome! In fact, it was almost perfect and not awkward at all!
Jolyn: Woots! So... who won?
Me: HAHAHAHAHA.

Frankly speaking, we haven't officially hung out before. So it is quite a cheat to say that we've been best friends for more than a decade ~~but it's not my fault since she moved to Sri Bintang Selatan during high school!~~ but hey, we were anticipating for this day to come and it finally did! Bum de dum! :D

And as planned, we headed to DELIcious to have our early lunch.

such a girly hangout place, me like. (;

is it me or is this such a girly main dish? (:

yet another haven for the gastronomically-spoiled. (;

So while dining, we were reminiscing those good ol' Spice Girls days when she was Blossom the lead Powerpuff Girl and I was like her loyal sidekick, and catching up on those long lost high school years without each other. Awwww.

After satisfying our little tummies- they are little, because both of us shared the pasta and the brownie-, we went window-shopping and clothes-trying. Of course, more cam-whoring ensued.

And when we were at Topshop, she got me a cutesy funky ring for my birthday. Whee, thanks love! ♥

chilling at Krispy Kreme: she's such a doll. (:

Before the date, I was expecting the most awkward of moments. It gets pretty scary when someone once close to you is on a totally different path and then when you finally meet up again, it's like a make-it or break-it moment. But thankfully, it felt as though we didn't miss a thing. Or at least, I felt that way. (:

I had tremendous just-the-two-of-us kinda BFF-girly fun I haven't had in ages so let's not wait until we miss each other to do this again (or maybe we should, lol). According to her and so I agreed, we're like two entirely different people now but hey, some things never change. (;

thirteen years; and cheers to more to come! (:

I should hit the sack now, should be updating soon! Good night people! ;D

pray for cambodia.

2009-08-14T22:40:00.008+08:00

Alrightey.

Yours truly is feeling over the moon right now and not to mention slightly light-headed as well- which is not a good sign considering I've been trapped with a headache for the past three days. But while my head is still up in the clouds (no it has nothing to do with that thing called love), I shall jot down some thoughts. (:

How was Cambodia, people asked. Some may have asked out of excitement, some maybe just out of being polite. Here in my blog, everything's a personal testimony and conviction so I hope it answers your question hehe.

Cambodia was a blessing. It's ironic how we went there with the mission to bless, but in return I felt so much more blessed. My sickness during the trip especially opened my eyes- my recurring fever over a couple of days were seriously scaring me into thinking it was H1N1. But it was obviously a spiritual warfare and in weakness I rebuked the Devil. who was constantly planting discouraging ideas in my mind. Nonetheless, I automatically had three mommies in the team, which included pastor herself who took care of me and two sisters who cared for me. And when I thought in the middle of no where without my temporary mommies I'd be doomed, God placed a doctor there in the village. Not to mention, a truckload of medical supplies to boot! My Daddy works in mysteriously awesome ways. (:

Cambodia is a country with a 90% concentration of Buddhist believers and golden/yellow temples everywhere you go. The architecture is wonderful, yes, and the Holy Spirit was moving me as well. It really put a burden in my heart how much Cambodia needs Christ. My heart was further touched when I witnessed the people serving in the churches in Cambodia. In stark simplicity, stripped off all the fancy facilities we have back in our cosy KL churches, their hearts are raving for God. Sincere, undisrupted, genuine.

I especially was humbled during the worship seminar, where I saw youths giving all out banging on the drums with the strength of ten tigers, girls singing with voices like a choir of angels, and guitarists rocking it out as if they are performing for a stadium of a million people. But better yet, they are doing it for the one and only Jesus Christ and that just left me in awe. (:

us with Pastor Gina, Pastor Dina and Pastor Chanroth. (:

Spiritually blessed aside, we got to live like how the Cambodians do. Kevin and I were the firsts in the team to try out the Filipino street delicacy, the balut. Yes, it's the half-egg, half-forming duck embryo dish you eat with salt, pepper and a little lime juice. Just in case you don't believe me, I actually recorded myself taking a bite of it and it's on YouTube but since it wasn't that clear, let's just scrap that and believe that the daredevil, yours truly, ate two baluts. *grins

what it really looks like.

mixing the content with peppered salt and lime juice.

a glimpse of how it looks like, grossed out yet? :P

Trust me, it really was good. Yumm. :D

But that's not all. Dear Pastor Sothy took the whole bunch of us to see the Cambodian Palace (or something like that) and we fortunate people bumped ourselves into street stalls selling even more exotic food. I'd fly back to KL in regrets if I did not savour a barbecued snake, and fried tarantulas, crickets and well, an assortment of bugs.

it's like our keropok lekor and pisang goreng, lol.

Not a fan of the snake though, it was like eating barbecued plastic. I prefer the taste over the texture. Crickets were crunchy. Tarantula legs were like keropok. Mmm-mm! Haha.

my fellow daredevil!

me devouring a helpless tiny little cricket, muahahaha! >:)

For the less adventurous, and especially if you are a true blue durian lover, you have to try the teukrolok. It is a Cambodian signature slushie with a variety of fruits blended into one. And yes, the king of the fruits prevail strongest in this yummy drink. I like! :P

my slushie with everything inside!

And this...

...is just to show off, bite me! :P

Til' the next post, which will be up tomorrow, good night y'all! (:

knyium strolan nair.

2009-08-05T14:23:00.004+08:00

"Knyium strolan nair." That's Khmer for I love you. (:

I'm back from Cambodia, people! It has been an enriching journey and blessed mission, despite me falling sick for the first couple of days and fearing that I got the A H1N1, I am home, safe and sound. Praise God!

There are 7 days of stories to tell, but for now I'm just going to let my photos tell them to you. 400 of them, mind you, so you can just check them out in here and there. :P

I'm currently still under home quarantine, so will be back in Taylor's by Monday! :P

no worries mate!

2009-07-25T22:05:00.005+08:00

This is the stupidest post ever, but

I PASSED MANAGEMENT HAHAHAHAHA!

In fact, it's two notches better than I expected- I thought I'd fail and I was freaking out almost everyday until the moment I saw my results! Although I was praying and trying my best to not worry and leave it to the Lord, I couldn't help but be a chronic case of a worry wart because I somehow just lost faith in myself after the exam. ):

Nonetheless this passage -Luke 12:22-26, helped me calm my nerves all these while:

Then Jesus said to his disciples: "Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. ²³Life is more than food, and the body more than clothes. ²⁴Consider the ravens: They do not sow or reap, they have no storeroom or barn; yet God feeds them. And how much more valuable you are than birds! ²⁵Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? ²⁶Since you cannot do this very little thing, why do you worry about the rest?

This is such a miracle, God thank You so much for looking after me! You are awesome, Daddy! :D

Me is happy happy happy and oh, I survived FIVE whole days without the Internet (was fasting before the mission trip coming Wednesday, heh)!

Praise You God of earth and sky,

How beautiful is Your unfailing love,
Unfailing love.

- Chris Tomlin

---

On a not-so-bright note, I have a sad story to tell.

I was driving home from the hospital on Wednesday afternoon and I was going to park my car opposite my house and just before my parking spot, I noticed a tiny little orange kitten lying on the edge.

Scared shitless for almost running over the poor thing, I quickly got down my car and went to check on it. It was a really tiny, frail little kitten and it didn't meow, nor did it run away. So being a Good Samaritan cheh wah, I carried it home.

when I brought it home.

I gave it some milk but it wouldn't drink any, and just slept through all the hours until mom came home. One of its eyes were infected and was dirty with pus in it, so mom cleaned the eye as well as its nose. She told me the reason why it wasn't drinking the milk is because it couldn't smell properly. So we fed it milk using the little Vitagen straw, and played strings with it too. Despite being a lost and fragile bundle of fluff, it was a playful kitten. But hey, that's what kittens are supposed to be anyway! (:

slurp, slurp.

whee!

Next morning, I tried waking it up to feed it. But it was just laying there so lazily and as though it was saying, five more minutes please... It was adorable, and it reminded me of myself lazing on the bed. Teehee. So I lifted its tiny head gently and fed it with milk anyway, which it licked off.

But it was what happened after I came home that crushed me. I decided to clean its temporary home of an A4-sized paper box so I lifted it out and placed it in the cover. As I was cleaning, I stroked it gently and tried to wake it up. I was feeling a little weird because it didn't want to wake up so I shook it gently again. It stretched a little, and to my dismay, it turned into a brief convulsion, and then it just laid there, a small pool of blood flowed out of its tiny mouth so effortlessly. Not long after, its heart just stopped beating.

When the whole thing happened, I was just gasping in hopelessness. I rushed to the vet crying, but I wasn't surprised when he told me that it was already dead. Most probably from internal injuries since it didn't have an apetite and the blood basically explained it.

To cut a long story short, I cried like a baby after that and we buried it. I'm so sorry I didn't take you to the vet earlier, we wanted to send you to the SPCA on Saturday but you couldn't wait any longer.

Rest in place, my dear Marmalade. )':

two-oh, oh oh.

2009-07-19T20:46:00.004+08:00

Like some psycho, I'm listening to a song for the 259427th time on repeat. This time, credits go to Ju Enn for selecting Thunder by Boys Like Girls during our karaoke session the other day. Couldn't help but melted at the words. I'd marry the guy who serenades me this song ~~with a Tiffany's ring in the other hand~~. (:

And like a human without enough sleep, I have a splitting headache right now and am feeling cranky and emo to boot. Talk about a McCombo, haha! But fret not, I'm still gonna blog about my awesome possum 20th birthday celebration. Teehee.

Twas July 17th, the J-Girls (unfortunately, Mo was working and Nahda's all the way back in Dubai), Tash and I headed to The Curve. After ancient years of not having a karaoke session, all of us except poor Tash who was suffering with a sorethroat ~~but still yapping away loudly fine and dandy~~ crashed Red Box for a fine RM18 per person. From belting out Katy Perry and Lady GaGa to Nat King Cole and Michael Jackson, we had such a fab time singing our hearts out and eating and dancing. But we had a surprise when the bill came to RM113.25. Guess what we were also charged for? The cheap-o snacks lying on the table and the little miserable pack of crackers plus the two bottles of mineral water we thought was free. Oh ~~how naive we were~~ talk about robbery in broad daylight!

lalala~

There went our ka-chings we, or at least I, wanted to splurge at Bubba Gump's. Nonetheless, we headed to Bubba Gump for dinner and like a flock of cheapskate people (LOL), we ordered only the Shrimpers' Heaven and iced water. But I enjoyed the dish though, it was yummers! Though the portion was slightly disappointing for RM45. Hmm.

for shrimp lovers like yours truly. (:

Wondermilk cupcakes thanks to the J-Girls. ♥

Buhbye, Bubba. (:

But that's what you almost always get dining at an eatery with special decor. That pretty much explains the high service charge in the bills too, perhaps.

So during dinner, I texted Ivy.

Me: Hey babes, you coming?
Ivy: Oh doubt so babes, it's freaking jam!

So I was like, awww. ):

But when we were just about to leave, I got a call from her. Lo and behold after I saw her, three figures were following her from behind and to my surprise, they were Merissa, Suet Lai and Mia! Happy much, I stayed back and went to TGIF with them for their dinner. (:

boneless chicken something. :/

chicken salad?

pasta.

We had an awesome time catching up, ~~gossiping~~ networking, laughing, camwhoring, and just having a blast. At a point, nature called so Ivy and I went to the washroom.

But something was fishy when I returned to the table, and before I could complete what the- the TGIF team ambushed me and the next thing you know, I was standing on the couch with a ketchup bottle in my hand. With the team making a hullabaloo, I was very soon the center of attention in the entire TGIF, The Curve that night. Don't remember if I was blushing as red as the traffic light, but I was told to sing and thus I went, Cuz you're hot and you're cold, you're yes and you're no... And I actually forgot the lyrics to my favourite song I listen to 32598 times a day! That's not it, I was told to make a wish and blow out the candle on the mudcake Robin held quite far away.

us and the mudcake. :D

I was shocked speechless. I've seen this happened to so many other people but never have I expected I'd be a victim too but thank you, girls. For insisting to embarrass me on my birthday and like Ivy said, I won't have the slightest guts to go along with this ten years later so thank you! It's definitely a birthday I won't forget, you can bet your life on it. Haha.

Besides the fact that I couldn't find my car afterwards (it was so bloody near where Ivy's was geez!), forgetting to switch on my headlights, getting lost and going through two bloody tolls on the way home, I had a night bursting with exuberant joy! :D And due to how the night ended, it was one heck of an exhilarating night as well, ehehe.

My body battery is dying right now so before it goes flat, thank you once again my dear girls for the best birthday so far! Your presence will always be the best present, and after such a long time, it was awesome seeing you PESS home girls again. You girls rock a million, and my heart goes to you. (:

xoxo!

---

your voice was the soundtrack of my summer,
do you know you're unlike any other,
you'll always be my thunder.

I said, your eyes are the brightest of all the colours,
I don't wanna ever love another,
you'll always be my thunder.

so, bring on the rain,
and bring on the thunder.

♥

miss independent who? (:

2009-07-12T19:45:00.011+08:00

Hola my dear faithful (and sometimes silent...) readers! (:

My hiatus didn't seem long enough but much have happened. I have both good news and bad news, which do you wanna know about first, ~~take your pick~~ you have no choice anyway but to read on. *boo

The bad news is much more serious and happened first so here we go. On Wednesday morning about 4.45am, my grandma slipped and fell on her way to the washroom. To cut the long story short, she is now admitted in the hospital lying on her back with a hip fracture and one leg shorter than the other. Any slight movement of the body is equivalent to excruciating pain that I personally really don't want to witness or imagine because honestly I'm scared, and I will definitely cry seeing grandma in pain. A three-week process of pulling her leg (pun not intended, for cheese's sake!) will be going on until her hip replacement surgery and mind you, the leg-pulling process is going to hurt like -insert foul word here-. Thinking about grandma going through this at age 92 (NINETY-TWO, hello!) really breaks my heart but I cannot do anything but help feed her and just pray, pray and pray. ):

So far, I really want to thank my church members for all their prayers and visitations. They mean a lot and are encouraging much. Thank you and please continue praying for God's healing hands upon her. (':

On a cheerful note, I had a pleasant day today!

After lunch at KFC (a monthly craving I have, PMS much? Haha!), my personal bodyguard-cum-church buddy-cum-assistant Samuel and I went to The Mines shopping mall (mind you, that place has changed heaps and is a lot more enjoyable to hang out in already!).

We first visited this rather famous salon (which I shall tell you its name if you ask me personally) I passed by couple of weeks ago to enjoy its RM10-hair cut promotion but to my dismay and utmost displeasure, the service was horrendous and the staffs were cocky. As we both entered the salon, nobody greeted us and when we were told to wait, the couch was unavailable because the staff themselves were sitting on it happily chatting away. When the stylist approached me, I was told that the hairstyle I requested was a 'fashion cut' therefore it needs a wash and thus will cost me RM88. From RM10- what I expected to spend- to almost TEN times the expenditure, I was horrified and gave no shit contemplating that unreasonable 'offer'. Besides the stylist was such a ~~cocky bitch~~ arrogant woman, so I ~~said, talk to the hand and~~ left.

Looking for another salon, we bumped into this smaller but rather professional-looking one which offered the same RM10-haircut but done by a professional hairstylist. Cautious, I double checked at the counter and was gleeful when they assured me that it's applicable with any hair cut. The perhaps one-hour experience was a whole lot better than ten damned minutes at I'm-So-Professional-You-Ought-To-Pay-Me-RM100-for-a-Simple-Haircut Salon. Yes, the latter is officially and eternally blacklisted and they can kiss my ass. Anyhow, BCS2 Salon (yeah they sound slightly dodgy and they're not founded by Winnie Loo and I had to triple check their name before I wrote the name down, haha!) has a friendly bunch of staff who are also very professional, customer-orientated and you-get-what-you-see promotions which is a plus! The result? Bouncy, light and skillfully washed, cut and styled hair! I paid extra RM34 but hey, it's still two times cheaper than Bitchass Salon and I got twice the satisfaction! *sticks tongue out

Whoa, I got so worked up about some dumb salon. But honestly, if I were an undercover journalist doing reviews, they'll be so trashed I promise not a single soul with a sane mind visits that forsaken little Hair Hell.

While washing my hair, the shampoo girl and I had a little conversation.

Her: Is he your boyfriend?
Me: Oh, no. He's my buddy.
Her: Oh? But quite okay what, he's quite handsome.
Me: *thinks Oh ho ho, sure kembang la that fella.

This conversation is published upon the request of Sam himself, talk about conceit! :P

Anyhow, I have been looking for a cute dress for myself and as I was window blog-shopping, I met this Karen Miller-inspired gorgeous babe of a dress and fell head over heels in love.

courtesy of Modeliciouz. (:

One thing that broke my heart: it's sold out. AND, the blog shop is closed. )':

Oh, the heartache! After much moping around, in a relentless but miserable search for the next perfect dress, I finally found one today through a real, walking-required, trying-possible shopping session! And Little Miss Chatterbox is très happy once again! (:

Besides being sweet enough accompanying his leader/buddy the whole day, Sam treated me to my monthly dose of Starbucks wonder.

Me: I'll have the grande Java Chip frapp, please!
Staff: It's only RM2 away from a Venti, you sure you want the Grande? *sheepishly
Me: *thinks Ah damn this guy is good. Oh, okay!

As my third attempt of getting a job at Starbucks ~~ooh I'm so persistent and strong-willed or maybe just plain perasan~~ I asked if they were having any vacancy. With better luck this time, he mentioned that they were looking for a female part timer so lucky me filled in the application form. May be getting a phone call couple of days to come I suppose. (:

A long post this is but a happy Rachel babbles a lot so pardon moi. This is one of those moments I don't get writers' block so celebrate this happy day of mine! :P A day so pleasant and almost complete. All that are left is to purchase that lovely, lovely dress, hunt for a pair of sexy, strappy and TALL heels to go with it and then let the birthday celebrations begin! Yeah, I'm yet to celebrate my long-over 20th birthday bite me.

And since I'm here. Lemme do a little thank you shout out!

Rae: BFF love, thank you so much for your lovely (more like hyper) phone call all the way from Adelaide which woke me before it was even my birthday, haha! Thank you for anticipating, remembering and spending a little of your credit calling from the land down under. You are the best BFF ever! Loves! xo

Ed: For calling me at 11.59 pm sharp and wishing me precisely a minute later. You have come a long way, my love. And I'm glad. :p Thank you for being such an extra sweetheart! (: xx

Ps. Lynda & Connie: For your lovely birthday cards! Especially to my home girl, your card is the best gift ever! It's one of those letters/cards one would open up and read over and over again because it's filled with encouragement, appreciation and simply genuinity. I love it loads (and your one-of-a-kind text message which I heart much as I heart you!), all the more because it matched my outfit that Sunday. Hehe. (:

Thank you to those who sent me that 18 birthday text messages. You guys made my very boring data-entering day in the office! Haha! (x

Thank you, Sam, Lydia and Sis. Lily for a delightful birthday lunch at Secret Recipe although the staffs were slow and served my food last, hmph! :P And thank you for insisting to give me the Usavich bunny even though I begged you guys NOT to! :P

Thanks, Mom for the best form of present ever- CASH. ;)

Thank you all 80 to 90 people who wished me on Facebook, whether for the sake of being nice or out of genuine sincerity. I hope I didn't miss replying to any one of you, and I hope me replying one-by-one showed my deepest appreciation! (:

Last but not least, to the two babies sharing my birthday, who I doubt read my blog; happy birthday Najat and Khai Shin! We are a year older, but definitely a year more gorgeous! Hehe. :D

Til next time, cheerios people! (((:

P/S: Photos will be uploaded soon! ;)

sweet escapades.

2009-06-30T17:16:00.007+08:00

This post is ~~long~~ four days overdue and I almost couldn't be bothered blogging about it but since I have nothing to do, why not.

Guess where we were going? ;)

So us J-Girls with the exception of Allie and Jolyn crashed Urbanscapes last weekend since the Management nightmare is finally over ~~but still haunting me :(~~ and we have nothing else better to do. Thanks to Flo's coaxing me to go and flirting dirt cheap sales, awesome music, delectable yummies, arts and culture in my face, I succumbed to temptation and drag the rest of the girls along. Mo's high school friend Puteri came along too. :D

There were like a gazillion little stalls selling dirt cheap clothes and accessories and shoes I wish we went there earlier to feast our eyes on all of them and perhaps drain our purses dry if I wasn't so broke.

I may sound conceited but I love this photograph I took! :P

The food was nothing extravagant although Dessert's Bar and Palate Palette were basically the highlights there. I didn't eat much although I was famished because I wanted to shop. But I did get myself a scoop of the former's creamy heavenly vanilla ice-cream. I'm a sucker for this classic, so vanilla for the win! :)

KLPac is an ideal place to hold the Urbanscapes I would say, because of its artistic element and creative energy gushing out like water from a broken dam. Every inch of the area you go to is a place of photographic art. And I also like the whole concept that allows visitors to just sit on the lawn, eat and sway to the music. Feels very much like abroad, only the weather here almost drowned us all in our own sweat and ruin pretty pictures of ourselves. Blehh.

I bumped into quite a number of people as well. :)

the reason why I'm no longer an Urbanscapes virgin. ;)

with "Meet Guy" Jonathan and pretty Audrey! :)

Management crash course buddy, Sepet. :P

with the Fashion Writer of the Year! ;)

Personally I'm not so much of an indie rock fan so all of us didn't purchase the ticket to check out the gigs and anyway we had to go before was going to rain. It was quite a bummer because we spent less than two hours there and I doubt I will be able to make it for next year's Urbanscapes. :(

Fret not if you missed this year's round of fun, there's always next year! And of course, my very own snapshots. ;)

wish you were here! :)

I've been sleeping past 1 am and waking up 12 hours later and now I have a splitting headache after recovering from a sore throat and flu. :( With parties coming up, this is not the best time to ~~contract A H1N1~~ fall sick!

Anyhow, I leave you readers with this blogpost because I'm working for the following week or two. With all the scheduled parties, one does need the cash, no? ;)

P/S: I'm back on Twitter! Feel free to Tweet me! :)

rebel nights.

2009-06-21T21:28:00.005+08:00

Hey ho, merry doe. That was random crap and I'm supposed to be studying Management right now but blehhh.

I had loads of fun yesterday evening at UCSI's Hollywood-themed prom night. Not so much on the prom itself, but covering the event itself was enjoyable much. It was for MYC! magazine, you know the complimentary copies you get at McD's? :) Before I forget, many thanks to Zoe for giving me the opportunity to do this! :)

diva on the red carpet, move over. :p

Though it was optional to bring a photographer, I brought Jonathan anyway so he can weave his photography magic here and there. Hehe.

I love DSLRs!

I won't go in so much into the prom's details as I'm going to do that for the article so let's just skip to the exciting parts, shall we?

I'm excited already, lol.

We were sitting at the same table with Liang, Christien and Lavin. :D If you don't know them, boo you lah. Haha. Anyway, besides being served food like VIPs we are (ahem!), meeting cool new people, snapping photographs of celebrities and rubbing shoulders with them while at it, I think the best part of yesterday was the after-party.

the R&B star and I. ;)

when boredom strikes and you have a camera.

VIPs, yo! ;)

Not exactly a party but we ~~were delaying our stay at the prom interviewing people and snapping photographs so that we~~ missed the last train home, that's all. *grins

While walking to the LRT station...

Me: Wouldn't it be so amusing if we missed the train?
Jon: And then what?
Me: Oh, we could like hop on a cab and go to Jalan Ampang or somewhere... *ahem

So the train station was only closing when we arrived but the counter was closed thus excitedly I squealed a big yes! And we walked back to the hotel nonchalantly. This is the beginning of one hell of an adventurous night!

Into the lift we go up, joining a mat salleh and two Malay ladies.

Me: Oh my gosh, this is sooo fun! I can't believe I'm doing this, this is crazy adventurous and my mom would so totally kill me if she found out blab blab blab...
Jon: Um, um...

When we stepped out of the lift...

Jon: Shall I repeat what you said in the lift earlier?
Me: What, why? What's wrong?
Jon: You know there were people in the lift right?
Me: Uhh yeah. And...?
Jon: *quotes me
Me: *smacks forehead* OH SHIT.

Yeah so we were lepaking on the couch contemplating who to call for help, until Mel saw us, heard our story and decided to give us a ride. Which on the way, we met two of her friends and experienced her ~~really really really~~ crazy driving. She drives a stick by the way, how cool is that? ;)

Anyway, we were dropped off at Ampang by very sweet but psychotic Mel ~~although I'd so prefer to follow her go have fun and not go home~~ and Ed generously took over and drove us home. It was like 12.40 am so it was really sweet of him to come rescue us poor souls, haha.

It was 1.45 am when I got home and yes I left out 34674 parts where phone calls were coming in like my number was a hot line and of course my mom's calling and yelling over the phone every five seconds.

Yeah, my mom was crazy worried but this ain't gonna be the last time I have events at night (and I'm not going to pull these stupid stunts to scare her shitless everytime I do)! But hey, how often do I get to experience these rebel nights hitchhiking rides from people you met for merely a few hours and calling for help at wee hours in the morning right?

Come to think of it, it wasn't as crazy as I wanted it to be anyway. Hmm.

we make a fab team, don't we? ;)

just cause.

2009-06-16T00:15:00.002+08:00

Which do you prefer? :P

Just came back from the movies, watched Terminator: Salvation. So not my kind of film eh? Oh well, I've watched quite a number of films like these being with Ed. They're not all that bad. Sometimes we just have to give and take. I bet he has never watched as many chick flicks in his life, thanks to me. :p

the J-game.

2009-06-12T22:52:00.005+08:00

I've just finished writing an almost 2000-word essay this morning at four, about gender and its relationship with journalism. I must be crazy for wanting to watch these films now without the J-word ringing in my head every five seconds in my sleep.

I was flipping through Section 2 of The Star earlier and read the review for State of Play. Sounds very much like the whole mainstream media versus online media debate thing but very centered on investigative journalism (surprise, surprise!). It got four out of five stars and after watching the trailer, I'm keen! :D

Then I realised, hey there are actually more journalism-themed films than I know! The Devil Wears Prada aside, I think I'm going to spend my July break watching these:

No, not because Hayden Christensen is in it. :p

your journalistic integrity or the ISA?

Of the Watergate scandal.
(I think this film never came on screen here, bleh! )

Ever since I took the step of faith to pursue journalism, my mind broadens day by day that journalism is definitely not merely about writing. It is a profession only some know how to appreciate, and one with a lot of unspoken rules and manipulation, and one with many stakes at risk. Journalism is not a fair game, and there are so many other players which you cannot see. Speaking from a view of a Journalism undergrad, I regret no moment going through this course. Well, maybe the technology classes are bit tedious la...

But it's great that film makers are churning out amazing and thought-provoking Journalism-themed films like these. They make me proud of what I'm doing and who I'm going to be in the near future (well, I am graduating in 1.5 years time!). So far I only remember lots of telly series going on about medicine, crime and investigation, law enforcement and justice but hardly any regarding journalism. Except for the local series Frontpage, which was a decent attempt and I supported it all the way through.

If there is any more J-themed films, drop me a message! :)

released, refreshed, rejuvenated.

2009-06-07T20:23:00.006+08:00

Hey people, I reckon nobody noticed my MIA for the past three days but anyway, I just got back from Genting for my church's annual camp. :) I slept for three hours after I got back so pardon me if I seem to be talking gibberish because I'm feeling bit lethargic now. Heh.

Anyway, I'm feeling so much better now. All my burdens I've been carrying for the past half a year and longer have been released, my duty and goals as a child of God refreshed, my soul rejuvenated. It was a very simple and down-to-earth camp, in all ways. Unlike previous years where we stayed in hotels, this year we had a nice villa with simple (but delicious) home-cooked food served. We had our service in a room sufficient for worship sessions and sermons. Some of us stayed in our comfortable dormitories sharing with another ten people and more. It was very simple, but everything was sufficient.

It was when we worship God, sing His praises, hear His word and speak to Him, that made the whole camp such a rich one. Pastor Lynda preached on the basics- love, joy, hope and faith. Nothing especially out of the ordinary but that's exactly what we needed. Or at least, what I needed. For such a long time, I lost my focus on God. I did not forget that He is the center of my life, but I lived life with my priorities all set wrong. The world is so attractive, pastor said, and she is so true. We get caught up with everything the world has to offer that we forget that God is the center of it all. God is the creator of the world. We often forget this; God gives, and God takes away.

In this very fundamental camp, I learnt lessons after lessons. That we have a choice to be joyful when we face challenges and trials. Not a hypocritical act, but trusting that the Lord is with us and He will bring us through it. That we must always be alert about being in the world but not of the world. Sometimes we are so sure of ourselves we don't even realised that we have fallen into temptation. That we have hope in Jesus.

I shot this when I visited Hillsong Church in Sydney. :)

For such a long time, I've been thinking about all the hurts, the sins, the burdens, the problems and the recent breakup with Edwin was quite a blow to it all. In camp itself, these things were running in my mind as I worship God, as I hear His word. I kept telling myself that I need to let go, and let God. That did not work, and then I just knew I have to divert my attention to Jesus and away from my troubles. On the last night of camp as we prayed, the Holy Spirit just filled the room. I focused on Daddy, and the Spirit just touched me and I tears just fall and I couldn't stop speaking in tongue. As I prayed, I felt release. Like I have let go of all the bitterness, all the hurts, all the disappointments, of my relationship with Edwin, and left it all at the bottom of the cross.

It was a struggle I had to let go. For almost a year, I held on to these things that have been hindering me from coming back to God. I have been so insecure and afraid, and yes, I have been far away from Daddy. As we grow up, we know many many things and we supposedly become wiser. But at the same time, our hearts grow stubborn and cold. It it true when they say, the longest distance in the world is from the heart to the mind.

I wanted to go out there and give my testimony today but ~~I was too shy, haha~~ anyway I could relate to Ian's. But here is mine. I really thank God for this camp. It is through the simplicity of this camp, that God spoke to me. To tell me that I've strayed too far away, that it's time to come home, that I should remember and refocus Him in the center of my life. Everything I have is His, and my life is to be lived for Him, not for the world. Shamefully I have forgotten that, but I remember the time He told me that He wants me to do mighty things for Him in mass communication. I haven't figured out what He wants me to do, or how He wants me to do it, but I trust that in some way or another, my career will glorify His name. :)

It is harder to let go of my relationship with Edwin, but I knew that when God gives, He takes away too. Okay, our relationship wasn't His will from the beginning but I believe God has a purpose of putting Edwin in my life. And I guess I've been spending way too much time with and on Edwin that I've forgotten to do the same with God. I understand that all the more God wants us separated. I will never regret loving Edwin, but if it's not a relationship that is Jesus-centered, and it doesn't glorify Him, obviously we have to let go. My heart's slowly healing, and I believe that God will eliminate my insecurities and fill this void in my heart with His abundant love. as long as I am walking closely with Him. I also know that when He told me that I'm going to be okay without Edwin, He will keep His promise. And for that, I choose to be happy. :) Besides, I'm done being depressed! Haha.

Honestly, I'm still a tad bit afraid of losing Edwin. But I'm doubly afraid of losing grip of God and myself. For a couple of times, I've fallen. The world's so attractive and the flesh is so weak, how true. But I didn't attend the church camp and experience God to return to my old ways.

I'm still fragile, but I choose to lean on my Heavenly Daddy.

cannot say it better.

P/S: Brothers and sisters-in-Christ, please pray for me. Thank you! :)

a masquerade mask.

2009-05-31T01:08:00.005+08:00

I'm pretty amazed how I could laugh so genuinely tonight, and so loud and happy while at it. I could hardly feel pain, or sorrow. I seemed far from depressed, and definitely did not look the part as one who has just gone through a painful break up.

But then, feelings cannot be concealed for long. In the middle of a party, that specific emo and lonely vibe surfaces. Slowly and inevitably, the mask removes on its own as I dread the end.

Baby, life without you is like days without sunshine. It's gloomy, depressing, and basically dead. No matter how happy I am when I'm out there and partying, the vacancy don't just fill itself. At the end of the day, the one I'm missing is still you. When I drive to college and back home, tears still fall. I miss you sitting beside me and holding my hand, when we drive. I miss lying my head on your shoulder. I miss pecking your cheek when the traffic light turns red. I miss us singing together when the radio plays our songs. I do.

I used to call you immediately after I come home. But now that I can't, I would try passing time by going online. But it just went by slowly, minute by minute. I give up sometimes, and tried going to sleep. I would read your text messages one by one while crying, and when I finally grow tired, I fall asleep. I was wrong though when I thought going to sleep would keep my mind off you, because I see you in my dreams. That's the closest I could get to you, so I guess it's not an entirely bad thing after all. It's no difference when I go to bed at night. You're the first thing on my mind when I wake up, and also the last before I go to sleep. It has been like that for the past one year and a half, and it is still the same. I used to go to sleep late, happy and contented I have spent the day with you. I used to wake up excited, for I have another day to spend with you. But now I go to bed, wishing your arms were around me as we fall asleep together. My pillow is very stained by tears I don't even bother to wash anymore because there are more to come. And when I wake up, disappointment just falls upon me because I don't get to see your adorable sleeping face next to me anymore. I wish I would just go back to sleep so that I don't have to be reminded of your absence in my life everyday.

I miss you baby. Not hearing from you makes me feel so insecure and lonely. I wonder if you miss me too? I still call you baby, yes. I won't stop until I fall out of love with you. Which won't be anytime soon, I'm sure. If I could have just one last wish, I just want to spend the night in your arms.

I love this photograph of you. I miss your smile (and perhaps your crazy hair too!).
Wonder when will I see it again? :)

I miss you.

2009-05-29T23:33:00.005+08:00

I just want to touch your face...
And if it's not too much, can I hug you...

... and not let go?

I'm not Mary Jane without you.

you'll always be my baby.

2009-05-28T21:09:00.006+08:00

What you're reading next may not make sense, because I'm not in my most fabulous state and I'm struggling to put words together to describe what have happened so forgive me?

I'm sure all of you who often visit my blog noticed the new blog skin. I chose this skin for a reason, with a hope that I could see myself as the girl in the header one day, though I don't know when and how long it'll take me. By now, you guys could have figured out the situation I'm in right now.

Yeah, Edwin and I broke up.

Believe me, and believe him when we say it's really not as sudden as it seems. Sure, we have our differences and our little fights but that's not why we broke up. It's a pretty long story, and honestly I don't know how to explain. But one thing for sure, we're doing it out of obedience to God. Shamefully I have to admit, being the one called to call the shots, I had been running away and avoiding Him for three whole months. For the past three months, I just refused to let go and insisted to have Edwin by my side. I knew I had to let go someday, but I wasn't ready... and I still am not.

I presume you guys have a lot of questions; how do I know if that's what God wants, or why are you so sure that God was speaking to you? Let me just simply clarify God speaks in His own significant manner. :)

This heartache is no different from what I went through two years ago. Only this time, I'm calling the shots. I don't know which hurts more though; having someone leave without telling you, or knowing that you can't speak to the person you love for months or longer. I'm so overwhelmed by the pain of letting go, of withdrawal, of absent contact, of separation that I don't know how to write them all down.

It was our last date yesterday, and though it started off bittersweet, the hurt crept in as the hour went by. I guess it was when we were hugging by the balcony (?) in the mall that I felt so broken. It's as though my body crumbled on the inside, I let my guard down unwillingly and I just lost control of my tears. I whispered to him how I would miss him but couldn't even speak properly because I choked and the tears just fell freely.

Ironically, I was the weak one. I was amazed that he could hold in the tears still (ah, here comes the male ego, eh? haha) and he unfailingly made me laugh and smile. All I wanted was time to freeze. I wanted so bad to just hug him still, and cry in his embrace. I did, but time was never known to be kind. At night when we spent our last few hours, I was struggling to keep myself awake for as long as possible, I guess likewise for him too. We both had our guards down as we said our final words before the big disconnection. I wanted to stay awake because that meant I still have him.

I don't wanna close my eyes,
I don't wanna fall asleep,
Cuz I miss you baby,
And I don't wanna miss a thing.

But I fell asleep anyway, and I wish I never woken up. I don't want to wake up every morning to realise that this isn't just a nightmare in my sleep. To find out that he isn't by my side anymore.

He used to nag me and make me go to bed early, to which I would answer that I want to spend longer time with him. You'll still have me tomorrow, he would assure. But we both know he cannot utter those words to me last night. There's no reason to stay up anymore, so I guess we'll both go to bed early from now on. I reckon he's happy now that I go to bed early, and he need not nag me anymore. However, I cannot guarantee tears won't wet my pillow every night because I don't want to lose the reason why I lose a few of my sleeping hours. That reason is my world, that reason is him.

Since yesterday, I have been as vulnerable as an apple crumble. My heart twisting and body crumbling on the inside, I couldn't stop myself from crying everytime I think of him. I heard his voice for the last time this morning, and immediately a tear fell and I realised how much I am already missing him.

I've been listening to my break up playlist on repeat. I wanna cry my heart out, cry until I'm exhausted, cry myself to sleep, cry until I'm emotionally drained. I want to dwell on this pain, I want to mourn and I don't want to get over this. I don't want to forget him. I don't want to... I just don't want to...

I can't write anymore.

Nothing will change that.

of road trips and double dates. ♥

2009-05-08T19:04:00.009+08:00

Spontaneity is a new game I'll play.

If there's one thing I'm proud of, it's gotta be my rusted li'l ol' red Kancil. Within a couple of hours, the Cili Padi has traveled to Sunway, got lost in Seri Setia and Sg. Way, ended up in Taman Bahagia and then Sea Park, and finally arriving at our new destination- Kelana Jaya. The journey did not stop there, as my Cili Padi carried us all to Puchong and lastly Bukit Jalil before I returned home somewhere ~~over the rainbow~~ near the Mines.

All thanks to these two budaks ~~Jonathan and Amely~~ whom I shall not name.

Not to mention the RM3 parking fee we paid for a ten-minute embrace of Sunway Pyramid. Ahem.

Nevertheless, this ~~kanasai~~ road trip was a fun and ~~petrol-wasting~~ adventurous one. Haha okay okay, I'll stop giving you guys the guilt trips but eh, you guys should have paid for the mall parking fee! :P

So after a very "exhausting" road trip around Klang Valley, we decided to go to 101 Mall for a meal at Nando's woohoo my favourite! *ignores Ed's glare lalala...

Ms. ~~Syok Sendiri~~ Gorgeous xD

The brother and the bubbly.

Yet another failed attempt of breaking the record of drinking as many glasses of iced lemon tea as possible. This time, we drank only six. :(

We were talking about Ed's outdated-ness when it comes to news. I seem to know things around him better than himself so...

Jon: Eh, go read people's blogs la. Keep up!
Ed: I don't bother to read blogs except hers (mine).
Me: Yeah so you're always the last to know about stuffs.
Ame: Well, accountants only know the figures at the end of the month what.
Me: And mass commers know everything!
Jon: ...live and streaming!
Ame and Jon: Maybe that's why you guys are together!
Ed and I: Maybe that's why we're together! *simultaneously

Ah, how I love the idea of opposite attraction. ♥

I was never fond of going on double dates, and I'm yet to change my mind but this wasn't bad at all. I guess it all boils down to who you're hanging out with. :) It's pretty ironic what we've been planning for and forgotten about happened so spontaneously... way past history and who we were. Talk about bittersweet. :)

A picture to amuse you.

On a random note, my right arm feels lenguh from carrying the glorious Canon XL2 for IDM's video-shooting assignment ~~which weighs like a tonne of bricks~~. Oh, I bet Mr. Anan has no idea how that feels like on a girl so le petite. But oh well, I've finished recording so yay me!

Korean BBQ Chicken lunchbox I had yesterday.

Among the things that make me très happy!

Upnext a rendezvous with Jessie and the boys. Can't wait! ;)

c-ch-check it out.

2009-04-30T21:47:00.007+08:00

I've been waiting for this ~~moment~~ issue of Seventeen for ages (the May issue, that is).

the Bryan McF interview.

every writer's honour.

the best project I've ever done!

spot my name? ;)

My pride and joy in print. Gosh I miss my days in Seventeen! *squeals

Finally, also, is my mid-semester break. Away from 8am classes ~~which I almost always fail to wake up for~~, tutorial work and ASSignments... NOT. We have one week cut off from our break just for replacement classes, and the oh-so-tedious video-shooting/assignment. *headdesks

Depressing news aside (I've been nothing but depressed lately what a surprise), us J-girls -that's Journalism girls for you- had a good girls' day out indulging in comfort food, window shopping and chick flicks. And of course, to celebrate the psycho woman Jolyn's 20th! Hehe.

We treated ourselves to Pasta Zanmai once again, for the birthday brat loves Italian gourmet ~~and wouldn't shut up about the waiter checking me out who I personally think he was kinda cute and I'd go flirt with him a bit if only Jolyn's voice cannot be heard in Paraguay~~.

We ate, savoured, indulged, chat and laughed and then the bill came.

Me: Hey, why not we divide the bill up equally?
Mo: But I didn't drink iced lemon tea and I only ate one sotong!

That, was THE punchline of the day.

Of course Mo didn't eat only one measly little sotong, we shared creamy pasta with smoked salmon served in a bowl as huge as your momma's ass.

The desserts as usual were too pretty to be eaten but yeah well, they still ended up in our little tummies.

happy Journalism students, hehe. :)

Unfortunately, Jolyn couldn't stay to watch a Lebanese film with us, Caramel. It was the first time I watched a Middle Eastern film, and I really should credit Mo for persuading me to go for it. Actually, she hardly did but I just want to check it out myself! And I'm proud to say that I really enjoyed it. It was a chick flick that's light-hearted yet it touched on the taboo and controversial issues that go on in the everyday life of a Lebanese woman. Heck, the director/producer/lead actress Nadine Labaki is freaking hot ~~that's why Mo wants to marry her~~. Hehe.

lovely lovely poster.

Anyhow, I'm glad you enjoyed yourself lots Jolyn and once again, happy 20th and we love you psychotic woman! :D

a very happy birthday girl. :)

put your keys back in your pocket.

2009-04-23T18:08:00.006+08:00

Seeing Megan featured in 17 but Shaz in National Service, I was wondering how a boyfriend would feel seeing his girlfriend modeling for a magazine.

Me: How would you feel if your girlfriend was the one modeling for 17?
Ed: Indifferent.
Me: ..... what, WHY?!
Ed: Because I always knew she was hot. *smirks menyampah-ly
Me: .... *falls in love all over again

My boyfriend's such a bitch sometimes I love him. ♥

--

Okay Earth to Rachel, back to Media Law. *groans and stabs self repeatedly

take me to the asylum, plsthx.

2009-04-22T21:26:00.003+08:00

SO
FUCKING
FEDUP
AND
FRUSTRATED
AND
EXHAUSTED
CAN'T
WAIT
TO
MOVE
OUT
OF
THIS
BITCHASS
HELLHOLE.

the very long couple meme! ♥

2009-04-20T23:17:00.008+08:00

~~Taken~~ Inspired from Suet Lee's blog and wanted to do it for fun, so here goes!

Rachel's part:

Tell us about the first time you met and your first impression of him/her:
Haha, we attended Youth Enrichment School together and honestly, I didn’t notice him at all. Not until he did that ever famous chicken dance in one of the skits, and thus I remember him as the Chicken. I forgot his name not long after but he remembered me when we were at a conference months after. Seeing the chicken dance, he’s obviously a fun and outgoing guy yet reserved. :)

Tell us something funny about him/her:
You would think that I’ll say the chicken dance but my last memory of that was in YES. The whole world knows my boyfriend is Mr. Nice so when he says something mean (but of no harm!), it’s freaking funny. And he cracks me up with his stupid facial expressions and dramatic actions. Bodohness. :P

What’s a weird habit or quirk that s/he has?:
He doesn’t brush his teeth until he finishes his brekkie. I don’t know but it’s just weird to me. And he takes off his shoes when he drives, weird much.

What makes him/her happy?
He’s ~~easy to please~~ a simple guy. He loves gaming a lot and that makes him happy. Durians, green tea, anything spicy make him a happy tummy-satisfied guy. And I’m sure above all that, I make him happy. Kan kan sayang? :p

What makes him/her sad?:
When he sees me sad. Cheh. :p He is seldom sad and is very laid back., so I myself don’t really know what makes him sad. O_o

What makes him/her angry?:
Talking to people who wants help but won’t listen or having to repeat things a million times. He’s quite intolerant of stupid people, I guess lol. He gets pretty angry when I get sarcastic during our fights, but he almost always doesn’t shout or snap back at me. Awww. :)

What excites him/her?:
Well, awesome graphics in films/games, those warrior fighter costumes thingy bajigee mixed with superhero and funky weapons. Those boy stuffs which I could never understand. The other stuffs that excite him… for us to know, for you to find out. Hehehehe. ;)

What’s s/he like at home?:
LAZY. He slacks, he games, he sleeps and eats and watches anime. Tsk tsk.

What’s s/he like at work/school?
I wouldn’t know, but he sleeps in class sometimes. :P

Describe his/her room:
VERY simple. Typical guy room with nothing much but his posters, Gundam kits and figurines.

Do you know who s/he hates the most?:
My baby’s too sweet to hate anyone. Worst case scenario, he could only get SERIOUSLY annoyed at someone.

Have you met his/her exes?:
Unfortunately, no.

What’s the first thing s/he would do or say if s/he fell down and scraped their knee:
OUCH. And then he would go band aid it, and THEN he would tell me about it and I’d laugh at him and then he’ll be like, “Yer laugh at your boyfriend who fell down la!?” And I laugh some more. :P

What would s/he do in an emergency situation with other people involved?:
He takes a lot of time thinking what’s the best solution but he always put other people first. :)

Which shop would s/he spend the most time at in a shopping mall?:
Firstly, he is one cheapskate boyfriend. HAHA. Anywhere cheap and nice would please him much. :P

What would s/he have for a typical breakfast?:
Coffee or tea. Sometimes with bread or something like that.

Where would s/he want to go for dinner?:
Anywhere I wanna go. :) But he loves Japanese food. :)

What kind of movie would s/he choose at the cinema?:
Fantasy, sci-fi, superheroes and warriors- his type of movies.

Describe his/her taste in music:
Jazz is his favourite. But he’s pretty much open to anything. :D

If s/he wasn’t going out with you, who would s/he be going out with?:
Good question- someone like me. :D How do I know? Because his ex and I are quite similar people. :D

What item in his/her wardrobe would you like to burn:
OMG DO I GET TO DO IT?! It must be that fugly black tshirt with the stupid brown checkered collar!!!

What is s/he good at?:
Acting, gaming! Accounting, analyzing stuffs, and computers.

What is s/he totally horrible at?:
He can’t sing. HAHAHA.

What’s something about him/her that is annoying/infuriating?:
He’s always right I hate him. *pout And he likes to potong my steam a lot. Pfft.

What’s something that you two fundamentally disagree on?:
Nothing in particular I guess but we have our own mindsets. :)

What’s something that you two agree whole-heartedly on?:
No sex before marriage, no blowjobs after we do. Haha wtfreak.

Is s/he possessive?:
That’s the last word to describe my Edwin (in fact, I can be pretty possessive myself lol!). He gives me a lot of space to do whatever, but when we are together, I’m always held tight in his arms. Hehe.

Why would s/he succeed in life?:
He’s very single-minded, or in other words, very focused, relaxed, careful, and systematic. :)

What is the coolest gift that s/he has ever given you?:
His love for me. Cheh wah. Haha. Umm, quite a few things but I loved the bouquet of white roses he gave me for our anniversary. He’s also the first guy to buy me flowers! Hehe.

What is s/he obsessed with?:
His games la! :P

Why would s/he be dangerous?:
You haven’t seen him suppressing his anger. That alone is dangerous enough. *shudders. And oh, he’s pretty buff (if you don’t look at his little tummy lol) so he is capable of beating you up nicely ~~if you bully me hehe~~. But then again, I’d already have killed you with my sarcasm. :D

What does s/he avoid at all costs?:
Watching gay films like High School Musical and lame ones like Dragonball. He sticks to the original cartoon.

What does s/he spend the most money on?:
Going out with me hahhahahahaha! :P

Describe his/her typical Sunday:
To church he goes, which he either plays drums for the kids service or be the PA guy, have lunch after and the entire afternoon napping, texting me, gaming and at night he watches American tv or goes to the cyber café to game with his high school kakis. Lifeless kan I told you.

Tell us about a time s/he looked absolutely gorgeous:
OOOH I LOVE THIS QUESTION HAHAHA. When we attended this friend’s birthday party he was wearing this striped shirt we shopped for together with jeans and sneakers and his Mohawk hair. And I love it when he wears his grey Giordano tshirt cuz he looks so buff in it and I love love love it when he wears his RipCurl surfer pants it’s so cute if you know what I mean. ;P To cut it short, he looks good in shirts, surfer pants and Mohawks. :D

What’s something about him/her that would surprise all of his/her friends?:
That he can be one heck of a sweet-talker/romantic guy sometimes. :D

What do you love most about him/her?:
Laa this might sound conceited of me but I love that he is able to love me so much despite how fugly I can get. Hehe ok to do him some justice, I love the simple subtle things he does for me (and only for me to know) which speak miles. Also I love that we complement each other like cookies and milk. Heee.

The biggest lesson you have learnt from loving your partner:
That falling in love also means loving his flaws and weaknesses. As simple as that. :)

--

Edwin's part:

tell us about the first time you met and your first impression of him/her:
The first time we met, hmmm…..we didn’t actually met, shake hands, introduction and all those. We were indirectly introduced during 1st day of class. Hahaha, drama queen? =p

tell us something funny about him/her:
“Nyooooo”

what’s a weird habit or quirk that s/he has?:
She cleans up the table and arranges her cutlery nicely after eating outside.

what makes him/her happy?
Me, and when I state the obvious, that she’s beautiful. (Only this line works)

what makes him/her sad?:
Me, and dead animals, especially the ones she likes

what makes him/her angry?:
Me, annoying people and….when I ask a lot of questions when she’s angry

what excites him/her?:
Shopping. Enough said? =p

what’s s/he like at home?:
erm…lazy? XD or she wishes to be.

what’s s/he like at work/school?
Erm…goody goody? *coughschoolnerdcough* She tries very hard to give a good impression, well…who doesn’t?

describe his/her room:
Messy computer table. Messy chair by the side. Messy stuff beside the chair. Westlife and Avril’s poster behind the door. And your normal wardrobe and collection cupboard (where you hoard all your stuff)

do you know who s/he hates the most?:
I don’t think she has, if not, I’ll be listening to hear complain bout that person 24/7. lol

have you met his/her exes?:
Erm…no, I really want to tho. Just to see how is her taste.

what’s the first thing s/he would do or say if s/he fell down and scraped their knee:
“Bee, see…..got blood. =(“ while pointing at the bruise.

what would s/he do in an emergency situation with other people involved?:
Erm….panic, cry and call me I guess? XD I don’t know, I don’t think she has been through an emergency with other people involved. So I wont know…for surela.

which shop would s/he spend the most time at in a shopping mall?:
Erm….Shoe shops? Nose, vincci n the like. Or bookshop? XD we go there when we got time to chill and take a look at books~ hahaha, we sound like book worms and nerds. LOL!

what would s/he have for a typical breakfast?:
She normally doesn’t have breakfast. If she does, I guess bread or whatever is there. haha

where would s/he want to go for dinner?:
Any place, where there’s good affordable food. Haha, I didn’t say cheap okay. Atmosphere should be nice too, or is that me? XD

what kind of movie would s/he choose at the cinema?:
Chick Flicks, Romance and....English movies? =p

describe his/her taste in music:
Rock…emo? Anyway, she has a good sense of music too~ Lady GAGA (nah its here. =p) Katy Perry, 30sec to Venus…I mean Mars.

if s/he wasnt going out with you, who would s/he be going out with?:
No idea. @@ I seriously do not know…..

what item in his/her wardrobe would you like to burn:
Erm…don’t think I have one. Her fashion sense is good~ (cheh, someone bangga d)

what is s/he good at?:
Being creative, and doing romantic stuff? Like how she baked cupcakes, played ‘Spell’. She’s good at making slide shows too. Picture slide shows~ ask her for the link if you want to see one.

what is s/he totally horrible at?:
Not so sure. I would guess, being diplomatic, but I haven’t really seen her quelling an argument. >_< what’s something about him/her that is annoying/infuriating?:
Continues being sarcastic even when we’re arguing.

what’s something that you two fundamentally disagree on?:
Sleeping early and sleeping enough. LOL

what’s something that you two agree whole-heartedly on?:
Sex before marriage. Hahaha. Kla kla, too much pink will make us go @@

is s/he possessive?:
Erm…at times.

why would s/he succeed in life?:
Because she is determined and hardworking.

what is the coolest gift that s/he has ever given you?:
The almost 365 HAND-folded paper hearts with personalized messages and lyrics in them~

what is s/he obsessed with?:
SHOES! And shopping bags? XD

why would s/he be dangerous?:
Because her emotions most of the time get the better of her. =\ she can be a very emotional for a girl

what does s/he avoid at all costs?:
mint? =p hmmm…….Japanese, Korean and Chinese movies?

what does s/he spend the most money on?:
Most of the time=Food or Fried Chicken? (not so much now as she found a replacement for nando’s)
Once in a while=Shoes

describe his/her typical sunday:
Church, Lunch, Housework, Nap, Online, Dinner, Online. XD

tell us about a time s/he looked absolutely gorgeous:
Our 1year anniversary, she wore the black dress which I bought for her. =) which actually supposed to be a surprise but I didn’t have the wits to ask her discreetly which dress she wants. >_< She looked stunning, better than the time she got a professional makeup artist for Prom. Holding that bouquet of white roses with the secret smile of hers.

what’s something about him/her that would surprise all of his/her friends?:
That she actually doesn’t bully me? Most of the time. XD lol

what do you love most about him/her?:
Her character, her cuteness and how she can really be a sweetheart. How she goes out of her way, to buy souvenirs for people and make things for me during special dates. Eq, 18/12. Not dates where we go out.

the biggest lesson you have learnt from loving your partner:
She’s nothing like you, so give her time and allowance. Because it takes time for 2 people of different poles to understand each other. And that she’ll need time and experience to change, people don’t change overnight.

guys.

2009-04-14T12:56:00.006+08:00

Honestly.

What happened to starting off as friends, getting to know you and see how things go?

I don't know about other people but pick up lines and hey-I'm-interested-can-I-have-your-number nonsense turn me off (albeit my sincere appreciation towards their straightforwardness). Okay so you are interested but when finally we get to talk, you either bore me by :

a) having a questionnaire marathon about my views on relationships (oh emm gee please la, rushing off to get married is it?),
b) reply my messages 56309 years later (hey wait, who between us is interested again?),
c) interrogating me like I'm a criminal suspect (no I don't think I wanna tell you where I live thanks very much), or
d) expecting me to go out on a date with you when I won't even give you my number (how about never?).

So much for being 'interested'. I'm not here to immediately fill in the girlfriend vacancy spot of yours and if you're sincerely interested, at least be sincere about being my friend first. *roll eyes

That's the reason why I'm with who I'm with, and not you. Simple pimple.

Random: Lady GaGa is the shiznit yo.

build my hope, crush my dreams.

2009-04-11T12:16:00.002+08:00

I'm not going to Adelaide anymore.

Picture credits: ~orangebutt

indulgence.

2009-04-07T20:50:00.007+08:00

At 11pm yesterday, our nightmares assignments ended. Temporarily.

So how else to celebrate but go out and pamper ourselves silly? After submitting the Management assignment, Mo, Allie, Ju Enn and I headed to Mid Valley to just have some well-deserved fun! After all, we busted our ass for four assignments which were all due within a week. *cringe

Ju Enn and I were craving for Asian food while Allie wanted Italian, and thus Mohani said we should just go for Pasta Zanmai. And so we did.

Pasta Zanmai. :)

the interior.

I love the Japanese motifs on the plates. :)

see-through kitchen.

decisions, decisions.

the gigantic menu.

statement t-shirts. ♥

Ju Enn & Allie.

my creamy spaghetti with shrimp and squid. :D

Mo's spaghetti with salmon and sesame seed oil (something like that).

Choco-banana parfait- highly recommended by Allie. :D

My pasta was a great first choice. Allie and Mo fell head over heels over mine and were constantly poking at my yummy spaghetti the whole time. :D So the next time you visit Pasta Zanmai, go for spaghetti in creamy sauce with shrimp and squid. :)

And after having a nice long chat about boyfriends, parents, and matters of life and death, we went to the theatres to watch Confessions of a Shopaholic- the film I've waited MONTHS for! :D

Isla Fisher as Rebecca Bloomwood. :)

I love Confessions like how I love Bride Wars. Not because they are fantastic, high-rated, Oscar-winning, Cannes Festival-featured films- because they aren't. Lol. But I just enjoy chick flicks, and being an aspiring journalist and part-time shopaholic, aiming my position in a fashion magazine, I just cannot resist Confessions. Obviously nothing beats The Devil Wears Prada when you talk fashion journalism. And I think Isla Fisher is so adorable, and she didn't disappoint me portraying Becky. Although I didn't imagine the Tarquin I had in mind reading the novel to be as cute on screen! And I also wished they picked a hotter guy to play Luke. I mean, Hugh Dancy IS cute, but I expected a buffer guy to play him. I thought Bride Wars' Chris Pratt would fit that role perfectly. Teehee. While Leslie Bibb played Alicia perfectly bitchy, Suze... is like a completely different character altogether. Hmm.

As usual, the novels are better than the films. Anyway, Confessions on the silver screens isn't a big deal. But a must-watch for chick flick-junkies like me. :D

We headed on to Eclipse later on to buy Allie's white pump heels for RM50. It was originally RM130 so it was one heck of a bargain. They were sweet and demure looking, not to mention, really high! I can totally imagine Allie wearing a studded dress like the one Blake Lively wore in Gossip Girl, only in white. A mixture of the girl-next-door and Audrey Hepburn chic. ;)

Ah damn, I wanna go on a shopping spree. :(

But I'm as broke as hell now, but heck that's because I crossed out another item on my fashion wish list just today. Whee! :D

Anyways, last week, Allie, Jolyn and I went for a complimentary make up class at the Make Up Store. All thanks to Aileen, my editor. :)

the magic tools.

girls, makeup, mirrors and cameras. ♥

Ah, I'm signing out for now because me is exhausted. Who wouldn't be when you've been pampered all day? ;)

xoxo.

I miss Langkawi.

2009-03-19T17:48:00.004+08:00

Current state: Still depressed, binging on junk food comprised of potato chips in roast lamb and mint sauce flavour, home made pineapple tarts, Ribena and lots of Ferrero Rocher. And oh, watching episodes of The Nanny on YouTube while waiting for Gossip Girl season two to finish downloading. Very slowly.

On the other hand...

give me hell.

2009-03-16T22:45:00.006+08:00

What's the goddamn point of having something to lose it?

Everything you busted your ass for, everything your heart longed and ached over, robbed in a second.

---

I want a million bucks and go surprise my boyfriend halfway across the world and after that take our time seeing Rome, Paris, Switzerland, Budapest & Prague.

Or I could just take one year off and go backpacking on my own.

UGH.

Shutting out from the world.

no other words.

2009-03-14T19:27:00.003+08:00

"You're in my heart, just like a tattoo."

Picture credits to =vampire-zombie

going green.

2009-03-12T21:38:00.006+08:00

Okay, before you think I'm separating my trash into aluminum, paper, plastic, and glass, that I've stopped using the air-conditioner and that I'm recently elected as the President of the Environment Society, I'm not going crazy green.

It's just me and my obsession to stop using plastic (bags)!

I'm way past the new year's resolution-making phase and honestly, I haven't had the time to think of what I want to achieve this year. BUT, I have been doing one thing. Using shopping bags when I go shopping, or just plain refraining from using a plastic bag.

I don't know how this environmental-friendliness craze has gotten into me, and why have I been an environmental-friendly human out of the blue. Issues about the environment have concerned me all these years, but shamefully, I've never bothered or cared enough to go do something about it. But now that I'm actually practising it, it actually feels good.

Officially a sucker for shopping bags- another reason to spend? :p

Nevertheless, I would actually credit this awareness to my trip to Aussie. I don't know about other countries but Aussie's certainly one that cares about nature and the earth. And I have to admit, the shopping/canvas bags they sell look really pretty. Maybe that's one of the reasons that got me using them. I mean, you don't buy them for nothing right? I know, I know, they don't sell pretty shopping bags like that for a cheap price here in Malaysia. And even if they do, it isn't an everyday scenario. And you (or at least, I) will be tempted to keep those bags you got from abroad and keep them for the sake of ~~not getting them dirty~~ memories.

Whenever I see a canvas/cloth shopping bag these days, I get a rush within me and I'll be tempted to buy. I'm shopping for shopping bags ~~so that I can store more when I shop~~ for my shopping trips. How ironic.

Also, guess what? I'm refraining from taking away or in Malaysians' familiar term 'tah-pau' food too. As the whole universe already know, my tummy and taste bud are suckers for chicken, so there was this time I was craving for KFC and I was alone at home. I actually ate at the restaurant by myself, just for the sake of not using the plastic bag, or using the plastic utensils they give you in the plastic packet. ~~Talk about pathetic.~~ And today, I was buying mom a snack plate from KFC to bring home.

KFC staff: *taking plastic bag*
Me: Ehh, tak payah, tak payah.
KFC staff: Oh, tak payah?
Me: Ya.
KFC staff: *taking plastic packet with sauce and plastic utensils inside*
Me: Ehh, tak payah, tak payah.
KFC staff: Oh, tak payah jugak?
Me: Ya. *grins*

OMG, I'm becoming such an environmental-psycho I'm actually freaking myself out.

Ah, I'm not the only one. My mom is also turning into an environmental-friendly freak. It's as astonishing as it is sudden, because my mom was never known as someone who gives a damn. Haha, but I guess I was wrong. ;)

During weekdays when my mom works, and I go ~~have fun~~ study, nobody cooks dinner. So what my mom does is just tah-pau food home everyday. And as expected, polystyrene food containers are used as well as a plastic bag to put them in. What surprised me one day was, our lunch was stored in a tiffin! While watching Big Ideas for a Small Planet earlier, she even told me she's going to bring it when buying our dinner. A star for an environmental-friendly mom, what say you? :D

Throughout the (almost) 20 years of my life, I haven't really contributed to my dear planet Earth and this is actually a very simple way to do something to give back. The shopping bag's convenient and mobile and light, stores more stuffs or groceries (depending on the sizes, of course) and much more durable compared to plastic. If you have a pretty shopping bag, heck, it could be the next big fashion must-have! Just like the ever famous I'm Not A Plastic Bag tote by Anya Hindmarch. ;)

You don't have to start building yourself an eco-friendly house, or wear recycled record tape for clothes, you know. Start small. As the Malay saying goes, sedikit-sedikit, lama-lama jadi bukit or if you prefer it in English- little by little, it'll grow into a hill! Okay that sounded weird. Anyway.

Simple and significant; but goes a long way. I'm a ~~freak~~ friend of the environment, what about you? :)

the lost generation.

2009-03-09T21:54:00.006+08:00

roll on the routine.

2009-03-06T23:47:00.003+08:00

Classes so far have been okay, though I'm not exactly excited about Introduction to Digital Media. Don't get me wrong, I am intrigued and it'll be fun to learn. But I'm just not all that of a technical person. Anyhow, cheers to more interesting classes ahead. And no more dozing off in Management lectures.

I finished reading Angus, Thongs and Full-Frontal Snogging (thanks Ju Enn!) earlier and now I want a Scottish wildcat for a pet. It beats having a dog or having a younger sister. And that would be a perfect replacement to the bunny we have given away. No more teasing that bundle of fluff with the broom and see it growl furiously. Yes, my bunny growls. I'm listening to The Man Who Can't Be Moved on repeat and it reminds me that it has been years since I was obsessed with Irish boybands. I want to drink the soup mom's cooking even though I'm sweating my ass off in my room.

I'm still wearing my contact lenses now by the way, because my glasses give me headaches. Damn my eyes feel dry now.

And I seriously feel bad about missing the 25-minute gig by The All-American Rejects because I went strolling on the Singaporean streets and had my first taste of fried Mars bars. UK people rock, by the way.

Maybe if you just care a little less, and be who you are a little bit more, it'll be easier to get things through and over with, and end the hypocrisy.

Even if it's dead obvious nobody wants to.

seeing stripes!

2009-03-02T19:57:00.010+08:00

Who is ready for semester 3?

Not me, definitely.

I just came back from Singapore for cheese's sake! :( And oh, that would be the fantabulous story I've been wanting to share. Firstly, I just wanna say God is simply amazing. To bless me with this incredible adventure and experience- even when I've finished my internship! I admit, I was a little scared I won't be able to do what I was doing during the internship. Not until I've graduated. Which would be in almost two years time! :( But God works in the most mysterious and wonderful way. So here's my testimony! :)

Let's go back before the whole Singapore adventure started. I was given the honour to interview a former Westlife member ~~whom I used to have a huge crush on back in primary school~~- Bryan McFadden. Remember the blonde bloke with the middle-parting hair? The one cutie in every boyband ala Nick Carter BSB or Lee Blue? Yeah, him. And no, I didn't profess my adoration towards him during the interview. xD Anyway it was only a phone interview, but what the heck! Every aspiring journalist has to start somewhere! And it can't get any better than to interview a celeb! :D

then.

now. with fiancee Delta Goodrem. ♥

And now, what's all the Singapore hoo-ha about?

the real deal: The All American Rejects.

Yes, The All American Rejects. You know, those dudes who sang the ever famous Dirty Little Secret? Haha, I'm damn paranoid nobody knows this awesome band. :P

So when I got the call from Aileen, I was practically holding the excitement in until I hung up and called Tash to squeal my heart out. I was squealing alone, sadly because she was in the office. xD But dear Rae called all the way from Adey to scream with me after she got my text. God bless her sweet soul of a BFF. x)

Anyways, I met Alisha (Fly FM news presenter) and Radin (NST lifestyle writer) on the way to Singapore. A rep from radio, newspaper and a magazine! How cool's that?

Gorgeous Alisha and Radin. :)

All of us went to the Nokia 5800 Comes With Music launch event at Zouk Singapore. Yours truly included because she's a press member and she's legal... in Singapore! :P Then it was time to interview the Rejects. Boy, was it nerve-wrecking. Not because I wasn't ready but I didn't have time to calm myself a bit prior to the interview but I did eventually throughout the process. The boys were really friendly, and Tyson was a very good interviewee. He's got lots to say and that makes the interviewer's job so much easier. All the more because we only have ten minutes for each interviewer. :(

Muttons at Midnight interviewing the people who made everything happen.

Being a band-fan-girl I am, I got them to sign on my CDs and a notebook. So typical of an amateur press member like me. xD

Me: OMG I'm so short!
Ty: Nah, we're just too tall!

the Rejects, y'all.

So besides visiting Singapore for the first time and interviewing celebrities face-to-face for the first time, it was also my first time clubbing. At 19. How shocking. Especially for Radin and Alisha. They were like, "We have a virgin with us!" So being my 'kakak's, they were my first clubbing chaperones. :) On the other hand, I wouldn't consider myself to have clubbed. Because we were just hanging around in the club, and the party hasn't started. It was 11pm, and all the waiting was driving me crazy (you should've seen the outrageous queue, it reminded me of KTM rides during peak hour. LOL.) and more tired. I have also forgotten I have money and didn't bother to buy myself a drink. Silly of me, right? I was at Zouk Singapore and I was legal but I went back to the hotel to rest. HAHA. Anyway, I would want to try it again. With my girlfriends, and Ed around. :)

me and the girls who taught me how to party! ;)

Snap, snap!

For the next two days, I spent time going around Singapore with my mom and a church member. Can you believe they went to Jurong Bird Park and the Night Safari when I was in Zouk? Sheesh. We went to Sentosa Island anyway. I love the Images of Singapore. The history screening was really cool and creative while the live museum next was very interesting. It wasn't boring at all, and I learnt lots. Despite the cultural backgrounds of Malaysia and Singapore being pretty much similar, I think Singapore did a very good job in portraying them in the museum.

We also went to the Butterfly Park, saw the signature Merlion statue, visited Chinatown and Singapore's Petaling Street- Bugis Street. For all you shopaholics out there, you should so go to Far East Plaza if you love shopping at Sungai Wang- only the things they sell there are far from lala. I saw shoes, shoes and more shoes everywhere in Far East and gosh, I regretted much I didn't shop there. Though I can cross out one of the items in my fashion wishlist now. ;) Charles and Keith stores were EVERYWHERE ~~like duh it's homegrown~~ but I didn't get to shop much because of limited budget. :(

What I love about Singapore? It's squeaky clean. I'm serious, being a "fine" city is not all that bad. It's a relief for somebody who cannot stand dirty public toilets like me. Which reminds me of my trip home in the KTM. I slept all the way back to KL lest I feel nature calling me. The condition of the KTM was quite dodgy, and you do not want to visit the toilet. Which I didn't after hearing what my mom told me about it. If there is ONE thing I cannot stand, it's gotta be dirty icky stinky public toilets. Ugh! As long as I can put nature on hold, I refuse to use the loo.

I also love Singapore's public facilities and the transportation system are on par with international standards. And I definitely love the stylish Singaporeans! I hardly spotted any fashion faux pas, and please do excuse the senior citizens when I say this. Haha. Needless to say, Singapore has its own sale benefits so it's quite fun to shop there without worrying that you burn a hole in your pocket. Though I wouldn't trade living in Malaysia anytime. Just for the sake of the food. ;p

I had an amazing experience, if this isn't the millionth time I'm saying this. All thanks to Seventeen for believing in me, trusting that I can do the job. Assigning an amateur like me to a big task like that blew my mind, and I'm immensely grateful. :) I hope I kicked ass, though I must get back to writing the whole interview soon. :p And I have a feeling I'm gonna feel so ridiculous one day when I look back to this blog post and go, "OMG I was such a noob!" But I don't mind that day coming- the day I can go, "been there, done that!". :)

More piccas of my Singaporean adventure. :)

I hate this part right here.

2009-02-24T22:00:00.002+08:00

It was just yesterday when I said I was happier than I was otherwise. But the not-so-fabulous part is starting to take its toll on me. Slowly but paining me little by little.

And damn all these emo songs playing on the radio. Even my iTunes is going along with it. The bouquet of flowers (or Ferrero Rocher) here is giving me a bittersweet feeling too. Adui.

Who knows when will the tears start flowing out from the brokenness in my heart? But until then, it's definitely building up. Slowly. Like drips of water falling and collecting inside a cup. Maybe I'll just wait til the cup overflows. Damn I'm so emo slap me please.

God, You brought me there, I know You'll bring me through it.

It'll all be better in time.

hot n' cold.

2009-02-23T21:41:00.003+08:00

So much have happened lately. The fabulous and the horrendous. All happening simultaneously. At one point, I'll be thrilled and screaming in excitement. At another, I'll be moving in fear and bursting in tears. Gee, that rhymed. Haha.

Despite the bad stuffs going on, I'm more happy than otherwise. But I doubt I'll be blogging about them anytime soon. Should get myself some peace of mind. As for the awesome events, they'll be out when the time comes. ;)

Rachel's 101 Guide to Cheer Yourself Up.

2009-02-15T23:34:00.005+08:00

I was feeling emo and sad earlier on, but you know what cheered me up?

made in Italy, bought in Langkawi.

made in Germany, bought in Langkawi.

made in New Zealand, bought in Langkawi.

made in Switzerland, bought in Langkawi.
(my absolute favourite! ♥)

made in Australia, okay fine, it's made locally. the only reason why this picture's here is because the boyfriend bought it for me. :p

fruit vodka ~~and Starbucks~~ is yummy. :D

And I shall introduce to you...

Ming Ming the "sewious" duckling! :D

Isn't she the cutest? Okay, I admit I have been watching the preschool show called Wonderpets. It's just too cute. I didn't really pay attention to the show until Vee was singing the theme song in the office and it made me laugh so hard I decided to watch it again. The Malay version. On tv9. Horrible and lame translation aside, the Wonderpets are darn cute. Me likes.

Someone buy me the plushies! You buy me Ming Ming only I also don't mind. >_<

♥

2009-02-12T22:55:00.009+08:00

Guess who's back from Langkawi! The boyfriend and I's long awaited beach vacation had been a fantabulous one! It was such a blast and I love everything about it that I'm having a hard time thinking of an ideal blog title post. So a heart it shall be. :D

Believe it or not, I haven't unpacked. And I'm actually under great stress and frustration right now no thanks to the PTPTN application process. I'm tearing my hair out trying to register myself online but I shan't disturb my own happy post-vacation aura. Lol.

Day 1
We (that includes boyfriend's 11 college mates) arrived in the evening and for dinner, we drove to the little tourist spot/town (?) near Pantai Chenang. The entire stretch of road at night is lit up and gorgeous, although incomparable with the night scene at Star Hill. ;)

one of the really nice looking restaurants. :)

We had dinner at this Chinese restaurant packed with mat sallehs. Steamboat and seafood, anyone? The food wasn't fabulous, honestly. But the tomyam soup for the steamboat was damn nice, I admit. Hehe.

After dinner, we strolled along the road, realizing it's a hot tourist spot with all the bars, restaurants and shops. That was when we stopped by this mini market and bought junk food ... and vodka. If you didn't know, Langkawi is dead famous for being pleasure island- duty free priced cigarettes, alcohol and chocolates! So who could resist a little vodka? ;)

jalan-jalan.

Back at the resort, we hit the beach to relax. Our rooms were barely five minutes walk away from the beach, how cool is that? We played cards, drank, chat and laughed at the beach. I reckon I overestimated my alcohol tolerance level and gulped down half a bottle of vodka too fast, because at a point, I burst into tears (after going red and hot in the face). I felt especially sad thinking about Rae leaving hours before, and I just sat down there by the beach crying out loud with baby's arms around me. I didn't know if the alcohol was talking but I was just telling Edwin how I'm gonna dread being in uni without her around. And that was when I started missing her badly. :(

a flash-shot of the beach near midnight.

Anyway, while everyone returned to their rooms, baby and I stayed lying on the beach watching the midnight skies and the bright round moon shining down on us. Of course, the wind was blowing us chilly as we hear the little waves breaking. It was like a moment we have been waiting for so long and a moment we didn't believe we were living. :)

Day 2
Almost everyone did not have a good sleep the night before but the itineries have to be fulfilled.

at the Oriental Village/Langkawi Cable Car.

So we went on the ever famous Langkawi cable car! It was fun, and absolutely gorgeous. Took a million photos at the lookout points, with crazy strong wind blowing the girls' hair all over the place. And yes, it was cold insane. Surprisingly, it was tiring too. We did a little jungle trekking -okay, just walking up/down steps!- and oh my, our legs were in pain and by the end of the thing, everyone was just panting. I didn't feel old, I just felt damn unfit! Lol! The most amusing thing though, was my baby's acrophobic. I didn't know it was that serious so I was kinda laughing at him when we were crossing the bridge in mid air, and he was holding on to me so tightly it was so cute and funny. :)

walking in mid air.

embrace the fresh air. :)

Lunch that day was pretty stupid though, and it was worse because I wanted to pee badly and we were just driving around looking for food in minimum time. We ended up at the airport, having ridiculously-priced meals and complaining about it. Edwin was so unhappy about it he didn't even buy anything for lunch! You can't blame him though, my (rather delish) bowl of assam laksa cost RM8 ~~like wtf~~ when we could've gotten it for under RM5 elsewhere. A bottle of mineral water and a packet of plain nasi lemak cost RM3. So go figure.

After stuffing our tummies with expensive not-so-fine food, off we went for our island-hopping adventure! Strapped in life jackets, we headed off far and deep in the oceans in a super fast motorboat (or whatever you call it). Our first stop was Tasik Dayang Bunting (directly translated would be Pregnant Maiden Lake). The lake is named after a hill in a nearby island that looks like a pregnant woman lying down. At the lake, everyone just jumped in and swam. As for people who can't swim like yours truly, we wore life jackets. Swimming under the scorching heat for two hours, we went on for our second island adventure at Eagle Island.

feel the strong wind in your hair, and take in the gorgeous view honey. ;)

Like its name, we could see eagles soaring majestically in the air and rather upclose too. Beautiful brown and white eagles flew around the motorboat we were in and landed briefly on the waters once in a while. Watching them was pretty fascinating. :D

Our last island, I assume, was a private beach. It was almost picture perfect. Crystal clear turquoise-shaded waters and cream-coloured sand burying our feet. We spent time enjoying the view, walking in the waters, sunbathing, building sandcastles and snacking. It was just so picturesque. :)

I swear for once in my life, I'm gonna live by the beach!

blissful. ♥

Dinner that night was satisfying and very sumptuous. We found a seafood restaurant in Kuah town and if you guys are visiting Langkawi, remember to have a meal at Sang Thye's. The friendly lady boss originated from Phuket and speaks fluent Hokkien. We had butter crab cooked with salted egg, tofu and vegetable cooked in thick gravy, preserved salted vegetables and tofu soup, and sour assam fish- all for RM300. The price of the crab took half of the bill already! But it was soooo delish! :D

Day 3
We started off our day shopping at Langkawi's biggest shopping mall- Langkawi Fair- though trust me, it's really not a biggie. Haha. The others bought quite a lot of stuffs, mainly alcohol and chocolates. I bought some chocolates too, but looked forward for the best bargains in the town center of Kuah. :)

Under the scorching heat (yet again), we headed to Eagle Square. Look out for the signature monument of a gigantic eagle waiting to soar high. There was where I found out that Langkawi means "brown eagle". Lang, which is a short form of helang in Malay, whereas kawi means brown in Sanskrit. :)

all the girls. :)

Having enough of being barbecued under the hot sun, we (or at least, I did) went to shop some more in Kuah. I was basically running around from one store to another and back, just to search for Ritter Sports in rum and raisin flavour. In which, my mission failed. But I managed to buy more chocolates. :D

Before we set off for the airport, we had dinner at Sang Thye's again. This time, we had claypot tofu and vegetables, yau mak (vegetables stir fried with oil and soy sauce), kam heong prawns and oh emm gee, the steamed spicy fish was the bomb! It was freaking spicy but man, it was freaking yummy I'm drooling as I type this! xD

And that was it, my adventure in Langkawi! Though I must admit I haven't gotten enough doses of the sun, sand, sea, seafood, and my sweetheart. :( Ed's college mates made the entire trip a really fun one, and I'm so glad they were there with us. There are more gorgeous photos on Facebook so...

CLICK ME & ME!

OH. EMM. GEE.

2009-02-07T16:29:00.002+08:00

When was the last time a person under the category of 'lala' added you in Facebook (when they really belong to Friendster) and started a conversation with you, one such as this:

Person

hihi

4:12pmRachel

hey

4:12pmPerson

how r u

4:12pmPerson

great

4:13pmPerson

same o..

where u live o

4:13pmRachel

how come u added me?

i live near the mines.

4:13pmPerson

facebook got ppl give add ma..

mean where live o

4:13pmRachel

Serdang?

4:14pmPerson

icic.... i know where

nice to meet u o..?

4:14pmRachel

what abt u?

4:14pmPerson

me live Cheras

4:14pmRachel

i see. that's cool

4:14pmPerson

u oso o

u study ar

4:14pmRachel

lol, i guess so

yes, u?

4:15pmPerson

woriking o

4:15pmRachel

oh, as what?

4:16pmPerson

cyber cafe o

how age u o

4:17pmRachel

u work in a cyber cafe? which one?

im 19

4:17pmPerson

22 o....

u know leisure mall ma

4:17pmRachel

yeah

4:17pmPerson

i at leisure mall there place o...but not inside o..

4:17pmRachel

i see

4:18pmPerson

u o

4:18pmRachel

im studying journalism

at taylor's college. :)

4:18pmPerson

wah

u facebook is u bf ar

4:19pmRachel

huh?

4:19pmPerson

u hv bf o

4:19pmRachel

yes i do

4:19pmPerson

i saw u facebook pic ma

4:20pmRachel

oh i see... haha

4:20pmPerson

i wan ffind gf ma

4:20pmRachel

on facebook?

4:21pmPerson

me on facebook rdy o

4:21pmRachel

no, i mean ur looking for a gf on facebook?

4:22pmPerson

yalo...

4:22pmRachel

right. haha

4:22pmPerson

i find nice gal o..not playgal la..i very hate play gal 1 la

yalo

4:22pmRachel

i see

4:22pmPerson

2 year no gf o

4:23pmRachel

where did u study?

4:23pmPerson

i no study jor o

4:23pmRachel

where were u studying?

4:24pmPerson

me stay where ar yulek o

4:24pmRachel

which school u went to?

4:24pmPerson

at taman maluri there o

4:25pmRachel

ur school is at taman maluri?

what school is that?

4:26pmPerson

my school name is forgot o... at polis there o

4:26pmRachel

u forgot the name of ur school?

4:28pmPerson

yalo...

4:28pmRachel

wow.. haha

4:29pmPerson

long time ma...me working wan think ma

haha

4:29pmRachel

i see...

4:29pmPerson

hw i remeber all thing o

4:31pmRachel

and ur not 85 years old.

haha

Person

lol

not la me 22 age only la

4:34pmRachel

yea i knw

Person

haha

got gal give me know ma

4:37pmRachel

er no

4:37pmPerson

oic

Man, I was so annoyed that he ended every single sentence of his with 'o' or 'la' or 'ma' that I was tempted to close the bloody window once and for all with my mind made up never to talk to him again lest I would march my way to the bloody cyber cafe near Leisure Mall and strangle the life out of him for being bloody annoying. He's 22 years old, he doesn't remember WHICH HIGH SCHOOL HE WENT TO, he looks for a girlfriend on Facebook and I have to repeat my question in THREE different ways for him to know what I'm talking about.

Kill me lah.

Oh, his name has been changed in case he decides to sue me over defamatory. HAHA.

the forever in bff.

2009-02-03T22:33:00.005+08:00

Ever since I downloaded Katy Perry's One of the Boys, I have not stopped listening to it on iTunes or on my iPod. Maybe I'm able to sing her lyrics backwards after a couple more days of listening to her album. Somebody buy me the CD!

I guess this week has been all about separation. I never really felt the downside when people fly off to another region or when I leave some place. Of course, I experienced the excruciating pain (or in some cases, the pleasure) of break ups but that's a whole other story altogether. I can tell you I'm not really feeling it right now either. Not so much, not until when life's routine returns and the awakening comes to pinch me. Then I'll realize I'm missing so much.

Come Monday, Rae and Debs are leaving for Adey. Although we had that farewell potluck picnic in the park the other day with the class, it's not the same if we didn't have our own little girlfriends' gathering and thus, we had one yesterday! Except, Deborah couldn't join us. :(

Allie and Rae. :)

BFFs under a faux cherry blossom tree. x)

I think it was one of the most girlish outings we ever had. After having lunch at Nando's (and we all know why, hehehe!), Julia had to leave while Allie, Rae and I went off to watch Bride Wars. My second time, for the sake of watching it with the BFF. Like my first time, she almost wanted to cry watching a few scenes. It wasn't an incredible movie, but it's all about personal connections I guess. Hehe. Allie said she kept seeing us in both Liv and Emma and hence, the BFFs say "Bride Wars is officially our movie!".

And did I mention I'm so glad I watched it again, and with my BFF? :)

We headed on to Times Square later on to snap some sticker photos, whatever you call them in Japanese. It has been forever since we discussed about doing that and it's seriously time to take some because I can't just print out our photos and slip them in my wallet. I still have the sticker photo I took with Mia 2 years ago (woman you better have it in your wallet too!) and it looks so good in my wallet so I must have one with Rae too! :D

keep these in your wallets! :D

Before all of us went off, Allie was sweet enough to treat us with a triple-scoop wonder at Baskin Robbins. That was when I started to feel slightly emo, though not enough to cry... yet. That was also when we hugged for so many times in five minutes. That was when each hug that we gave each other grew tighter, and gradually made me feel emo. Until I had to shoo her off, or at least Ben had to pull her away before we all burst out crying and hugging each other in Baskin Robbins.

It's so sad that I couldn't send you and Debs off, even if I wanted to. But I (might) will leave both of you a little surprise in the airport, which requires a little hunting. As a token of goodbye from me. So anticipate it yeah? ;)

Meanwhile, you two better not forget to bring the collage we made for you girls. Frame it, hang it proud on your living room wall and don't let Kien burn it! xD

xoxo, Jules, Allie & Chel.

While Rae and Debs are leaving, Friday was my last day at Seventeen. Though today I went back to the office to have lunch with the team at Leo's. So glad to see Suyi back from Hawaii and the whole team together having a meal, talking and laughing. I really do feel tad bit sad leaving, although Edwin comforted me by reminding me I'll be back soon. As a paid writer. :D

I had a fab meal at Leo's thanks to Aileen, and love(!) the hazelnut gelato to bits. Sherry has been such a sweetheart and she told me to pick something from her big bag of unused cosmetics and I picked my very first Anna Sui product- an eye shadow palette, complete with an artistic tin box. I heart Anna Sui for its classy designs and definitely the signature rose and the smell of roses that come with its products. There's one thing that Sherry said to me that I'll keep in mind when it comes to fashion and beauty- pick something that you normally wouldn't choose. Thus, the psychedelic dress that she helped me pick out and the eyeshadow palette. :D Oh, Naya also gave me The Trolley Dolly book. She apologised for not being able to give me any goodie because she's just a features writer but even if she didn't give me that book, she has taught me a lot in Seventeen. So I wouldn't mind a bit! Hehe.

For now, for now. I'm just going to chill to the max this February before the insanity from university assignments pounce on me. And as the following two years pass by, hopefully and prayerfully, I'll be back in Seventeen. Fingers crossed? :)

the little 17 family. :)

no arms, no legs, no worries?

2009-02-02T20:47:00.006+08:00

I haven't heard of Nick Vujicic until today, after watching a short YouTube video about his life. He has no arms and no legs, but he definitely has the capability to bring an impact to the world which is beyond what a normal human being like you and I could think of doing. There isn't a hint of hopelessness in him, not disappointment, not anger. In fact, I think he puts us all to shame. He lives his life as if it is perfect, and one can see God's hands moving in his life. A lesson I learnt from watching the video; it is not what we can do for God, it is what God can do in our lives if we let Him. It's not our capabilities, but our availability that counts.

We have a complete set of hands and legs, what are we doing for God today?

really.

2009-01-31T15:09:00.000+08:00

You know what this is about.

seventeen no more.

2009-01-30T20:51:00.003+08:00

The day I have never been anticipating for has finally arrived- my last day as an intern at Seventeen! :(

Actually, I don't feel like it's my last day at all. It seems as though I'm going to wake up at 8 in the morning on Monday, drive to the office, work and have fun, and then come home again. Anyhow, I'm just glad I finished my work, although I ran out of time to do my reviews. =/

It has been an awesome journey, no doubt about that. I don't even need to say that this has been fantabulous because I've been saying that for the 32475th time now but allow me to wrap things up.

Deciding to undergo an internship with Seventeen is like one of those rare life-changing moments you make in your life. Like, saying "I do".

Apart from learning a lot -heck, it was the most productive two months of my life- I am also more confident of myself. I came to realize that this is the career I want, doing something that I enjoy and getting paid for it. I want to write features, see my name printed in a magazine (especially in my FAVE magazine!), meet people, style products, feast my eyes on all the fashion items, try out beauty products, attend press events, get freebies, go for press previews, oh the things I can do are just infinite and far from boring!

So far, I've met the most fabulous people ever. Such as...

Aileen
An editor at 26. What can I say? She's officially one of my role models! I should also credit her for the watch that I got. :)

Esther
I had a blast at the OChaCha food tasting/shoot with her. Though a little bit intimidating, her advice will remain in my head for a long time. Thanks to her, a little intern like me got to do a mini photoshoot for one of her lifestyle columns. It was brief, but fun and unforgettable! Hehe. And I definitely will not forget those pain-in-the-arse invoice filing she assigned me to do! xD

Naya
My beautiful and intelligent mentor. She taught me loads and we have quite a lot of things in common (IMO). Love her!

Sherry
As scary as she seemed at first, I found out that she is someone who's quite fun too. Influenced by doses of anime, I reckon. I really enjoyed styling beauty products with her, because it's a very creative process -although sometimes it can be tidieous. As awesome as her short chic bleach blonde hair, she had brought me out to lunch several times and paid for those awesome food too! :)

Vee
What else can I love about this fashion writer, besides from getting my hands on gorgeous branded clothing and shoes to die for? He's absolutely funny, and cracks me up silly even if he comes up with the lamest jokes! And yes, I love the dress and the charmbracelet he gave me. :)

Suyi
I am utmost grateful that she remembers me and brought me up to the office on my first day. I love seeing her bold and quirky outfits, and she's one funny girl too!

Shirley
I'm not sure but I think she's more petite than I am. Very sweet Shirley is also very creative and I'm so glad she didn't mind advising me on the DIY products.

and...

Nicole
Simply for being a fellow intern. :)

I'm going to miss you guys loads, heaps, tons! Really hope to see you all on Tuesday for lunch. :D And I really, really thank God for this internship. Hallelujah! Woots! :D

what chinese new year?

2009-01-25T18:40:00.002+08:00

It's that time of the year again. Chinese New Year. xD

I don't know about you guys, but CNY has never made it into my "Favourite Holiday" nominee list. It has always been a boring holiday for me, even a dread. Being awoken by the noise of firecrackers and the ching-chong-changs. Picture me lazing on the couch all day in front of the telly watching Chinese shows (well, not that non-cable tv subscribers have a choice) with my mom and munching on cookies, snacks and packet drinks. It'll be less of a bore when visitors drop by, and I never minded receiving angpaus ~~and faking a smile while at it~~. Haha, who would right?

What about balik kampung, you ask? Firstly, my only relatives are all abroad. Heck, they're not even blood-related! I'm talking about my grandma's family, who originated from China and now I reckon they're all scattered all over the world. Even so, my 92-year-old grandma is not blood-related. So my biological family is basically my mom and my ~~good-for-nothing~~ father who I haven't seen since I was six. Not that I want to see him anytime soon.

Boring information aside, it's a little weird that I actually feel emo during this particular festive season. I can't help feeling a little sad inside when I look at adverts on telly, showing images of food and reunion dinners. I'm still very disgusted, by the way, that people are still consuming shark's fins so I made a little promise to myself not to eat them, even if I was paid to do so. It's just plain cruel. :(

Reunion dinners, on the other hand, had never bothered me a bit. Entah kenapa, I feel the pinch this year. Of having a complete set of a long dining table with eight chairs, but sadly, not the same with my family. A little part of me that's void, like a missing piece of a jigsaw puzzle. Mom bought home a couple of delicious Chinese dishes we normally don't eat, but we obviously know what's missing. And no, it's not abalones nor bird's nest soup. Although I wouldn't mind having those, hehe.

Whenever festive seasons like these come, I become numb to all that family love and warmth messages that come on telly. Year after year, I thought I'll never get to experience that but I say it like it's not a big deal. But yeah, it does feel like a biggie now.

Secretly, I really wish I could join the boyfriend's reunion dinner with his family. I want to play Taboo with his family after dinner, and mess with the honk that apparently, sounds like fart. Although it's really nothing fancy-pansy about the reunion, but I'm just curious. How does that feel like? Is it really like how it's shown on telly? Can you really feel the bond? This afternoon, I almost teared when Edwin said to me, One day, you'll be a part of my family's reunion dinner. I know it. That really broke my heart, but it gave me hope. And it meant the world to me.

I'm not sure why I'm feeling this void in my heart now, after so long. I just pray that God will fill the sudden re-appearance of this hole in my heart. I also pray for one thing when I finally have a family of my own, that it'll be complete. That's all I'm asking for.

Right now, I have mom and grandma. And Daddy too, who makes everything complete. :)

Blessed Chinese New Year 09!

thinking of you.

2009-01-24T23:14:00.002+08:00

Finally, after more than a week, I got to spend one good quality day with my boyfriend. Hanging out with him is my temporary breakaway. Away from bullshits I have to deal with at home, at work, in college and everywhere else.

With him, I get to express myself freely. No matter how ugly I could get, he never judged me. He never shouts at me. He listens intently. He corrects me when he has to. He makes me think. He prays for and with me. Talking to him made me realize things about myself.

And being temperamental as I am, he never failed to hug me tight every time a tear fall down across my face. Whatever the reason that made me cry, how silly they were.

He never laughed or mocked me for it. Instead, he carved a smile on my face and made me laugh again.

Sometimes I just don't want to go home to go through pain without him. Sometimes I just want to be invisible so that I can be with him, without anyone or anything in the way. Sometimes, I just need to hear his assuring It's okay, to feel better.

But I know, circumstances are there to help me rely on somebody that I could totally depend on- God. I don't blame nobody for that. Right now, I'm just thinking of him.

changeling.

2009-01-23T23:24:00.003+08:00

Changeling is officially one of my few FAVOURITE films. I've already written a review about it for 17, so I'll link it up for you guys once it's on the 17 blog yeah? :)

Meanwhile, you guys should so DEFINITELY check out the trailer on YouTube. It's an excellent movie. Based on a true story, it's very thought-provoking and heartbreaking. L-O-V-E it.

I feel more like a movie junkie than I ever felt before. I mean, the boyfriend and I watch a movie every date/week, unfailingly. Now that I'm working with 17, I get the opportunity to watch even more movies! Only, of course, they're free and I'm watching them before the release date. x) Not forgetting that I have the privilege of reviewing them for our readers! :D

Here are MORE films that I'm excited to watch:
1. The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (NOT because of Brad Pitt, for cheese's sake!)
2. Revolutionary Road (looks like another heart-wrenching one, but I'm up for it!)
3. Frost/Nixon (fellow journalists, remember the Watergate scandal?)
4. Valkyrie (Allie and Jolyn, care to join me? :D)
5. Confessions of a Shopaholic (chick flicks are my ultimate guilty pleasure! ;) )
6. Marley and Me (WHO can resist that adorable golden retriever puppy?!)
7. Hotel for Dogs (which kinda made me think that if they have hotels for cats, it would be equivalent with the Hilton)
8. ...

I better stop before my list grows to 125. Psst, don't worry Winnie I wasn't referring to you. :D Anyone care for a (make that a few) movie date with me? Hehe. :)

lessons I learnt. :)

2009-01-23T22:59:00.002+08:00

Things I have learnt:

1. To speak up for myself assertively but not rudely, and not be such a pushover. If I don't defend myself, there might not be anyone who will.

2. To be more initiative. Enthusiasm is one matter, initiative is another.

3. To be humble, but not underestimating my own skills. I still have time to hone my talents.

4. To know that I don't need to take my own sweet revenge, but just leave it to God because He is the Ultimate Judge and He sees everything.

5. To experience a sense of vindication that is beyond satisfaction, by His will and not mine.

6. To learn how to care and love your enemy- one of the hardest things to do for a human being.

my light is ultraviolet! <3

2009-01-22T22:57:00.003+08:00

Those who have not watched Angus, Thongs and Perfect Snogging should so go fly a kite. Saying that, I am also referring to guys too. Even my boyfriend loves that movie! Well, love is a very strong word so I should say he likes it a lot. And oh-emm-gee, I am now officially ~~in love~~ crushing insane on Aaron Johnson! *cries

He's a bassist. He's in a band called Stiff Dylans. I'm listening to Ultraviolet on repeat. He has emo hair. ...your light is... He's so cute can die. ... ultraviolet!

Girls, you should seriously check out ~~Aaron Johnson~~ the dress Georgia Nicholson wore in the film. Specifically, the dark mystical blue-ish purple one. Oh so gorgeous I want! I could so wear that with Forever 21's pair of purple pumps. *squeals

Oh-emm-gee, somebody slap me out of this teenage puppy crush phase.

time out.

2009-01-19T21:58:00.012+08:00

Less than two weeks and I'm no longer an intern at Seventeen. :( It has been busy at work, and I'm occupied outside of work too.

But I can't wait...

~~To finish all the DIY projects!~~

~~To watch Changeling this Friday with Naya.~~

~~For the boyfriend's exams to be over.~~

~~To go on CNY house visitations and collect as many ang paus as possible and wallop as much food as I can.~~

~~To go on a shopping date with the boyfriend, whereby his girlfriend-cum-personal fashion consultant shall make sure he doesn't commit any fashion faux pas. ;)~~

~~To meet up with my sister, with whom I shall have my Nando's ritual as well as receiving my souvenirs from Down Under. :P~~

To hang out with my homegirls whom I haven't met up with since 3894 months ago, like Mia, Ivy, Merissa, Wern, Mei Yen, Su, etc. :(

~~To go visit Winnie in Starbucks~~ and also (window) shop together at Sg. Wang for those rare vintage shirts!

~~To spend one last day with my BFF and my girl before they leave for Adey. I'll be coming a year after, don't miss me! :p~~

~~To watch Bride Wars again, for the sake of watching it with the BFF.~~

~~To see my cute and disgusting little brother very very soon! I miss you bugger! :(~~

~~To watch the entire season 1 of Gossip Girl before I grow extremely out of date.~~

~~To have a blast on my long-awaited beach vacation with the Hunny in my pot.~~

To undergo a Japanese gastronomic adventure at Tenji's with my cell group members. <3

2009-01-11T22:57:00.003+08:00

Just in case you were wondering why this blog is privatized yet again, take a look at my harassed cbox. It's really hard to miss. I apologize for the inconvenience of having to log in to read my blog but trust me, the last thing I want to do is delete any post nor shift blogs. Hell no over a bunch of fools.

I've never seen such an ignorant group of cowards before. To top it off, they also live in denial. I don't get why they got so defensive at the first place. Unless they are exactly the type of clubbers I have mentioned in my earlier post, they don't have to be so terasa. Correct or not? Siapa yang termakan cili, rasalah pedasnya. If you terasa, then your pasal lah! Just because I said something that may be true and you refuse to accept it, it doesn't reserve you the right to victimised another person to make you feel better. Because it will never make you feel better, and you bloody hell know it.

Not only they have selected minds, taking in the bits and pieces that aggravated them instead of looking at the whole picture, they also are coward enough to remain anonymous. Or even worse, leave behind incomprehensible nicknames with a foul e-mail address attached. I guess you left your dignity behind the last time you went clubbing?

That's not even the worst bit, the fact that they are oh-so-passionate about my opinions motivated the whole bunch of them to switch computers/invite their friends to come spam my cbox. Trust me, I checked every single IP address and they are ALL different. Passionate, or pathetic? You tell me.

Even if I did offend them, don't you think this is taking things a little bit too far? Online bullying version 2.0, hello.

Fortunately for me, I still have my dignity and poise in tact. Furious I might have been, I have not lost my sanity. I would've deleted that initial post for the sake of shutting those arseholes up. I would've deleted the cbox entirely. I would even have changed my blog URL. But I refuse. I still believe in my right of freedom of expression. I will not bother deleting every single spam they leave in my blog because that would only amuse them more by having a jolly time changing computers in the cyber cafe just to spam me. Don't I feel so loved?

Hence, privatization of my dear blog. Which I will relaunch soon enough after the pack of online bullies get a life and a beneficial hobby to spend time on.

end of story.

2009-01-11T18:00:00.002+08:00

I'm awed that people actually care so much about my opinions! But right now, I don't give a damn. Have a good day! :)

a little reminder. :)

2009-01-09T22:01:00.004+08:00

I couldn't be any happier doing my internship now. Everything just seem to fall into place perfectly that I don't mind not getting paid!

Although sometimes, when people try to bring you down by telling you what you're missing out, it really hurts. Since you're sincerely ecstatic about who you are and where you are now, who would want to be pressed down? And especially when you believe wholeheartedly that this is God's plan and this is what He wants you to do.

Then again, I was thinking, if God were to bless me with wages and the perfect internship, so what? It isn't my right at all to brag or be boastful. Because whatever I have now, they're all from Daddy above.

Just a little reminder to myself, to not be discouraged, to not be prideful, but to be grateful in all circumstances and remember that they're all showers of blessings. Thank you Daddy! :)

there's more to life.

2009-01-09T21:35:00.003+08:00

Have you ever entered into your Facebook homepage and you are greeted by notifications of new pictures being uploaded by your friends? Especially those who have been clubbing last night, or heck, for the past few nights?

Before you think that this is going to be a hate post, hear me out. I have to admit, being a teenager out of high school and now in a university, I had wanted to go clubbing. A brand new scene that I haven't been to, the array of alcohol with fancy names that I can choose to consume, the people to meet as well as the hardcore partying. Trust me, I love dancing, I do take alcohol occasionally (and with moderation), I love people, but the fact that people go clubbing because it's a "cool thing to do" turns me off big time. Especially when they form one album after another in Facebook, showing off their clubbing hobby and how much of a party animal they can be. Honestly, those pictures only read "lacking of attention" to me.

Tell me now: What is it about girls in ~~skanky~~ sexy clothing, make up as thick as kuih talam, all blushed up in the face -nothing to do with any branded blusher, really but intoxication,- hair all messed up, posing sexily or probably, explicitly obscene with one or more guys in proximity exceeding what is called the 'personal space', with a blue-colored drink in one hand and her lips on another girl? Are those really that cool? Can somebody please explain to me the hype about this hobby?

Is being drunk, dressing and behaving like a skank the next big thing now? Looking at the examples set before my eyes, I no longer want to go clubbing anymore. Simply because I am cool in so many other ways.

happy new year. not.

2009-01-04T23:23:00.002+08:00

How's my new year? To begin with, it's a dread (pun not intended). Not only I'm struggling with sin, but I think I'm having information overload. Information about serious business. I doubt my age and maturity (or vice versa) are able or heck, ready to cope with such. And I used to think marriage was serious business. When a relationship (and the things that come after, things that you don't know, and things that are akin to life and death) is already giving me migraines.

It's not helping when my broken family is breaking. At least, my heart is.

blah.

2009-01-03T16:14:00.001+08:00

I'm depressed.
Freaking depressed.
Someone take me out please.

Sighs.

two-oh-oh-nine.

2009-01-01T01:49:00.003+08:00

Yes, you would've noticed the new blogskin, which I'm sad to say wasn't really my first choice. Nevertheless, I'm settling with this one because I figured it would be a nice change. Regarding the photos in the header: yes I do love photography although I'm no professional, I love dresses (in fact, it's my favourite piece of clothing!), I love music and I know that little question that has been playing ever since you viewed my blog but hey, who minds wearing a comfortable pair of undies eh? ;)

Beside from the sad fact that this blog skin doesn't publishes blog post titles (until I figure out how!), I'm happy much with the skin. So happy new year people! May it be a fantabulous year ahead! :D

Hugs and kisses! ;)

P/S: Credits go to =homigl14 for the picca I edited. :)

bookworm me.

2008-12-30T20:56:00.002+08:00

Being a writer, I am ashamed to admit that I haven't been reading much. I haven't even finished my Princess Diaries series I bought, like maybe early last year. Neither am I done with the Shopaholic series. But working in Seventeen has done me good. Considering the vast range of novels and the prices that follow in bookstores these days, I have stopped purchasing books but hey, another advantage of working here- I get to read books, not pay a cent and get to review them! :D

I just finished my first set of book review today, like after one freaking month. Lol. And I got another four books to review! Woots!

So currently, I am reading:
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman (because it's really good!)
Twilight by Stephanie Meyer (just to check if it's that good, and if my IQ will drop three times lower as warned by Tash)

For the book review:
Real World by Natsuo Kirino
How Starbucks Saved My Life by Michael Gates Gill
A Good Girl Comes Undone by Polly Williams
Vanity Drive by Yvonne Lee

Yay, lazy me is reading again! ><

fly me to the moon. ♥

2008-12-28T23:08:00.011+08:00

Let's just say yesterday was the most beautiful day of the year. Though nine days late, -we became an item on the night of December 18th, 2007- we finally celebrated our first anniversary!

I was picked up from my house and baby greeted me with a "Wow". I was more anxious than excited about the date because my mom wasn't in a good mood so I didn't really realize how my outfit was like so yes. >< Thank you baby for the compliment. You know it's my pleasure to dress up for you. Especially in the dress you bought me! :)

We headed to Pavilion and as usual we would pay a visit to the bookstore. In a corner we cuddled and read The Five Languages of Love by Gary Chapman. Both our languages synched well- we both speak the language in terms of quality time. On another note, he appreciates acts of service while I need physical touch- not too late to know! But it is rather worrying because long distance relationships may not work well for me. :/

a secret smile. :)

Anyway, we managed to catch a movie (instead of sweetening the date up with some chocolate cafe romance because my poor cookie is still down with a cold!). Yes Man was a good film. A comedy with a dash of quirky but sweet romance. Loved it heaps. Five stars from me! :D

my favourite white roses. :)

the keychain on top is my gift for him. (we exchanged it as a significance of our anniversary) :)

In Pavilion itself, we bumped into Ms. Nat and her hubby. As always, Ms. Nat looked gorgeous. She was surprised to see me in a LBD and a handbag with killer wedged platform heels and told me I looked nice, and very corporate woman-like and that I look... ten years older. o___o

*stabs heart with knife

I took it as a compliment nevertheless. Hehe.

For dinner, we went down to Fusion Haven. Yeah, the food there is that good so we went back to celebrate the big day!

fantabulous fusion food!

a cozy ambience. :)

cookie's seafood pasta was aromatic and appetizing much! :D

my English herbs butter baked lamb chop was absolutely tender and flavorful. heavenly! :D

what's a meal in Fusion Haven without its signature dessert?

melt with Warm Hearts Chocolate and Ice cream. :)

Happy Anniversary, cookie. :)

Edwin McCain's I'll Be certainly is motivating me to write an emo and mushy post dedicating to my dearest cookie who's now all the way in Port Dickson for his church's youth camp. Why am I not there? Because I'm broke to the core but anyway, I pray that he'll have a blast there and miss me insane. :p

DISCLAIMER:
The following is dedicated to my dearest boyfriend and is filled with everything emo and mushy and some would say, romantic to the core. Don't tell me you haven't been warned! :p

Dear Hunny,

It's been a year. Sighs. :) Til this day, I am still in disbelief after all the rollercoasters we have been through. It is due to the fact that we are from different planets, we need double the effort to keep this relationship going and of course, I am thankful for God's grace.

It would not have been easy for us to love each other, seeing that we are complete opposites. I would've given up a million times, we both know I attempted to because of our conflicting personalities and flaws. But you really opened my eyes, baby. Especially during the times when I was in my darkest moments. Those times that I was literally going insane, when I was seriously depressed out of my wits, when I was feeling loveless (when all I have was just love), when I was pushing the world away, when I was pushing you away. You stood by me faithfully, reminding me that you're here and most importantly, of God's love, grace and mercy.

Those times when we were going through the downs of a relationship, they really hurt. When we seemed to be fighting to the end for this relationship, when the world and circumstances forcefully push their way against and between us. Sometimes I wonder if those were signs from God, or were they just tests? Then again, I remember what pastor said. If we keep thinking of who might be the one or who isn't, we won't put enough effort in a relationship like we're supposed to. And each time an obstacle stands in our way, it's going to encourage us to give up. So here, I want to thank you, for being a stubborn donkey and not letting me go. Nyaha! x)

On a brighter note, it has really been a fantastic year with you cookie. Although it started off for the wrong reasons, I boldly proclaim that I am falling more and more in love with you each day. You don't have much, that's for sure. You can't take me to fancy and posh restaurants all the time, nor can you pay for my shopping sprees. But you know what sayang? You gave me all you have. I know sometimes I can be unappreciative and such a baby, but I realized that you gave me all your love. I grew to love the man you are growing to be. A God-fearing man with a heart to serve. :)

Admittedly, I have thought that you didn't deserve me. But come to think of it, I don't deserve you at all. This relationship has humbled me in many ways, I see my flaws. I see your love for my flaws. And I have been slow and an ass when it comes to accepting yours. I'm sorry, sayang and I hope that in the next year, I would learn to accept them better and now that we both know our languages of love, we will work on it. :)

Remember how in the beginning when we were doubtful of our love for each other? We were cautious, waiting for a confirmation to see if this is really love. We got the answer now, and I would want you to know that you have been patient with all my shortcomings, my bratty character, my impatience, my ego, and my flaws which only you know and God knows best. You have been kind, speaking gently even though I threw the harshest words at you when we were fighting. You seldom envied. Anyone or for anything. You hardly boasted about anything, a humble pie you are. You were never proud, but I hope I gave you enough reasons to be now. :) Rude is definitely not the exact word to describe you, you are far from rude. You are an introvert, but very much selfless. Our fights proved that you are not easily angered. Your heart softens with my one sorry shows that you keep no record of wrongs, whereas you have to apologize 395726 times for me to forgive you. I don't recall when you have been happy with evil but you definitely are happy with the truth. You have been protecting me in ways you are capable of, trusted me despite my unstable self, and I just hope that we will continue to be hopeful and persevere through thick and thin. And that this love will -God willing- not fail.

If I were to continue, I would be sleeping by 4 in the morning and my blog readers will puke incessantly. Words cannot seal all that I feel and think about you, about me and about us. So thank you baby, for the past one year. Thank you for staying by my side. I'm deeply sorry for all the wrongs I have committed against you. You have been such a blessing in my life and I pray that God will continue to be with us. Essentially...

nothing beats the classic "I love you". :)

Happy anniversary,
Poohbear. ♥

where am I?

2008-12-28T21:12:00.003+08:00

I have a gazillion of photos to upload but I won't bother doing it in my blog because of a reason all bloggers know so here are my piccas from the christmas barbecue I had with my YA members, more church 10th anniversary shots, my one-day Malacca trip (album #2 and #3) with a few YA members, and a little gathering before Cynthia's departure to KK. So click away people! :)

Oh, pardon my rudeness. Happy belated Christmas everyone! Hope you guys had a blast cuz I did! Though I must say I got very irritated with the fact that Christmas is so commercialized that it has somehow lost its true meaning. Santa Clauses, for example are utter bullcrap. Firstly, that jolly old man doesn't exist and can no freaking way fit his obese physique into your non-existent chimneys in the middle of the night because if he did, the burglary alarm will go off and your dad will wake up to beat the crap out of him with a baseball bat secondly, Christmas is all about Jesus Christ. That's why it's called Christmas, not Clause-mas. :)

So again, happy birthday Jesus! And happy Christmas to all of you! :D

sweet december

2008-12-21T00:59:00.003+08:00

December has got to be the most happening month EVER!

At least, for me. I just came back from Kajang AOG's Christmas Night, "The Dream". It was freaking awesome. :D

So far, I feel as though I have made a right choice to venture into mass communication. Because I freaking LOVE events! I definitely do not mind attending events every week of my life and this month has been awesomeeeeee.

There is nothing much to blog about my anniversary with Edwin. We are just basically sighing in relief and happiness that we... well, made it this far together. We are in our reflective modes, looking back to the past one year and all the moments we shared together. We've yet to celebrate it, but we definitely will. Hopefully, God will continue being in the center of our relationship for the next year. Whatever happens next to us, it's absolutely up to Daddy Almighty. Thank you, cookie for being all that you are to me-I love you heaps! Thank You, Dad for Edwin and blessing us with the anniversary. :)

Oh, Christmas BBQ tomorrow! Yay for fooooood! :D

deal with it.

2008-12-19T23:54:00.004+08:00

Your car breaks down sometimes.
Your girlfriend is going through PMS.
Your boss gives you work minutes before you leave.
Your boyfriend hugs another girl.
Your best friend hates your boyfriend.
Your close friend cuts herself.
Your bag just got snatched.
Your fellow colleague is a ass-kisser.
Your headphones are spoilt.
Your anniversary felt like a break-up.
Your pendrive is missing.
Your shoes give you blisters.

People change too.

Deal with it.

Grace Unlimited.

2008-12-14T20:28:00.003+08:00

Finally, the event of the year -for Peace Charis AG, at least- is over! On Friday night was my church's 10th Anniversary dinner themed Grace Unlimited, obviously symbolizes God's mercy and grace on us. It is hard to fathom how amazing His love is for us, sinners who deserve nothing as such as His love. We hurt Him so many times in unbelievably terrible ways, yet He is always full of grace and mercy. All because He loves us. Thus, the whole event is to remind Christians and to impart this beautiful message to non-believers around us.

The church magazine- which I'm honoured to be a part of the editorial team! :)

Despite having a horrendous day myself -don't ask, please- the event turned out gloriously. As reported by our pastor and church members, the event touched many lives of non-believers and some even received salvation! All glory goes to God! :D

A local Chinese artist who reminds me a lot of my graphic designer colleague, Suyi. x)

The youth from the chinese church singing!

Young Adults! :p

I do not have all the photos with me because of some annoying technical error, but will upload the rest of the pics when I get them next week. Sighs. :p

my love is not a lie.

2008-12-13T22:23:00.002+08:00

I can't help my eyes from welling up as long as I'm awake. My eyes are so swollen I can't see properly. I'm very hungry but I'm letting the instant noodles in front of me absorb all the soup there is. I'm forcing myself to eat because my mom is watching, but secretly, I want to just puke it all out. I'm listening to a happy song but there's a lump in my throat. I wish the parties aren't all over so that I can intoxicate myself someway or another. I've been lying in bed for hours, falling asleep and waking up. But really, I just want to fall asleep and not wake up.

History is repeating itself, the one part of it that stings me most. It burns. It hurts. I don't miss that feeling at all. And never expected it to come back to haunt me.

What I have done won't justify for all the times you have wronged me. My selfishness and insecurity should not have been a reason to win your love and care. The two things that have kept me persevering, I don't know which one weighs more. But I'm just very sure of one thing-

I love you.

So much it hurts me so bad now...